Monday, April 26, 2004

News Flash: Links updated including my brand spanking new online photo gallery - please see links on the right

Okay, this is going to be a shortass entry as I have a 6:00am flight to catch tomorrow, which means I have to leave the house @ 4:30am, which means I need to go to bed soon.

Long weekend came and went, and here is what I have to show for it:
  • bloated abdomen from intoxicatingly potent fondue on Friday night;
  • corked thighs from playing ball on Saturday and Monday;
  • blisters on thumb and feet from playing golf on Sunday and Monday;
  • deteriorating eyesight from staring @ the computer screen with my contacts on whilst at Clinton's house.

    The following realisation dawned upon me over the long weekend:
    I really do suck @ golf. I don't really know why I put myself through 18 holes of self-esteem torture. I think it is about time I faced the facts and hang my clubs up indefinitely. Golf is possibly the most evil sport I have encountered. It does undesirable , and often health-damaging things to your mind. The game of golf, which had hitherto been challenging, is now but a chore and nearly considered a waste of 4 hours.

    Oh well, shall not lament on things one was destined never to be competent at. Shall stick to other exploits such as whinging, the sims and guilt trips (apparently).

    It pains me to inform everybody that there will be no updates until the forthcoming week, i.e. 3rd May.
    Have a great week!
  • Thursday, April 22, 2004

    Have been ultra busy busy. Life is just stressful when you're busy busy!
    There's been some kafuffles about my trip to Melbourne on Tuesday. Originally was meant to come back Wednesday (and make it to my first basketball game), but they have gently coerced me to stay an extra night until Thursday. Far be it for the person at the lowest level of the food chain to ignore such gentle coercion. Reason for the extended stay is to meet my next immediate manager and the team, who are all based in Melbourne. So if anbody feels like visiting Melbourne for a coupla days, gimme a call. Free acommodation!
    Anyway, I am on a 6am flight outta Sydney (and I thought 8:05am was bad! see below). Looks like it's going to be an extra long weekend for me. Though lots to complete before then, including studying - thrills of the nation!

    Managed to sign up to Gmail today. It offers 1000MB! That's major! I feel so special because I now have: in my grubby big-palmed hands!

    Not much to banter about today. Got in a hot tub with a guy last night (well sim-marissa did anyway) ... and bought a basketball hoop for sim-marissa to play with. I think she's pretty happy, although she needs to hold some kinda of art exhibition and I have no idea how to go about it. And I'm a bit offended that they automatically assume that all Virgos are neat. Because of this gross (mis)generalisation, I spend half my energy/time cleaning - unwillingly might I add. I swear Virgo is the worse star sign EVER. I am supposedly meant to be anal and clean. Who would choose adjectives like those to describe oneself? I'd rather be passionate and driven or something to that effect. Oh well, I don't believe it star signs so I shall digress.

    Stories of the day:
    An old lady was trying to peel off the cling-wrap from her delivered newspaper on the train this morning. Her hands were so frail that she was having trouble undoing it. In fact, her veins on her hands were gradually getting more and more bulbous. Such a simple task turns into an absolute nightmare. I was contemplating ripping the stupid thing off for her, but I was probably getting more angry than she was. Maybe you have more patience as you mature to make up for the bulbous veins?

    I gave the Coles lady a $20 to pay for a $1.80 lemon ice tea and she didn't yell at me or give me a death stare! I was so happy! I shall refer her name to City Rail - and she would win the best employee of the decade fo shiz!

    Tuesday, April 20, 2004

    I got into work at the most ungodly hour: 8:05am, i.e. I was sitting @ my desk and ready to blog at 5 minutes past 8. This may be no big feat for most, but for someone that sleeps in til 3pm if given the chance to, and cleansed of any anti-sleep mechanisms (e.g. clock/need to work) - this is a monumental effort. Alright I'm going to get my blog over and done with so I can do some real work for the rest of the day.

    Last night we had our first touch footy match for the winter season. Damn! I was feeling the cold already. I was wearing 3 layers and STILL shivering - and apparently it wasn't even THAT cold last night. Definitely cold-adverse which is ironic because I look like an Inuit. In fact, I have resorted to whipping out the good 'ol spencer this morning. Anyway ... yet again I managed to get into a kafuffle with one of the guys from the opposition. I think last night was the angriest I have ever allowed myself to become in a game. It was definitely the only emotional outburst I've ever succumbed to, but for the very unfortunate incident @ Bankstown basketball courts which resulted in an unaligned jaw. So what happened? Well I went down for a dump and usually what happens is that you try and push off on your defender to recover and get back into play. Instead of letting me do so, this MALE decides to hold on to me with quite a bit of force for 5 seconds too long. Extremely offended by this unsportsmanlike behaviour, I attempted to pull his arm so he would let go of my shirt. Before too long we were caught up in a tangle on the grass, with me squirming around getting more irritated by the second. Finally I got up and fully yelled out (albeit in the girliest voice ever *duh*) "you don't have to fucking pull me!!!!!" and proceeded to push him back down to the ground with every inch of muscle I had. He looked pretty damn stunned and probably would have hit me if I wasn't of the opposite sex. There is a certain sense of power and satisfaction when you are standing over a fallen man, especially after you've pushed him to the ground. Anyway, this all happened in back play (which is rather unfortunate), so only Sharlene (who was on the sidelines) and I think Alan witnessed it. Apparently Shar was on her way to defend me - with those guns, I'm sure she would have taken him out EASILY :D This MALE apologised afterwards, but it's a case of too little too late. It should have never happened and he should be very ashamed and banished from this earth. In fact, he should join the Canterbury Bulldogs - he would fit right in!

    So the unfortunate incidents involving Marissa and sport continues. I should really keep a tally.

    Monday, April 19, 2004

    News Flash: Photos from Gold Coast Posted ...

    ... please scroll down for Monday's dose of visual stimulation (thank you Shar for the photos).
    Don't photos spruce up a dull page? Speaking of which: Rebecca, you cannot possibly deny us the pleasure of daily RC updates! Commenting system/photos/design/images/ etc are all aethestic luxuries we can do without, but dry wit and stumpy remarks ... do you want me to die? Okay maybe a bit hyperbolic but you get the drift.

    Well the weekend that breezed passed was relatively active for me - just as well because I just realised this morning that I ate creamy/fatty cake on 4 out of the 7 days last week! ugh! Hmmm just had a fantastic idea - Kaya & Peanut Butter Cake for my birthday! PLUS I am beginning to notice the early signs of a hideous beer gut. (OshKoshB)GOSH! One of the side effects of owning an infantile beer gut is the feeling of your boobs touching your stomach when you are sitting. But of course it's not my boobs (because mine ain't that big) ... it is in fact the rolls on my infantile beer gut. Oh this is grossing me out so I shall stop forthwith!

    Okay so Friday night a bunch of us were @ the Opera Bar for Duane's bday/graduation drinks. I was very happy because they had my fave beer on tap.
    Saturday was a day out @ Centennial Park where we consumed snags, meat and more meat courtesy of the culinary expertise of Mr Kit Chan. We then played a bit of soccer (I am so heavy on my feet ... was definitely running like a Wally especially with those long bball shorts), volleyball and cycled around the park. It's funny because Bec, Shar and myself all turned up in bball shorts. People must think that we are tryhard ballers ... but there's no shame in that ;p I must mention that I scored an above-average 'bend it like Beckham' corner kick goal. Lots of witnesses to corroborate my claim!
    After a bit of a run-around, we proceeded to head to Le Chaddy's house for his bday celebrations. Food is always in abundance @ his house, not to mention TASTY! YUM YUM YUM! Sang karaoke for most of the night. Thought I was a competent vocalist when I scored 97 singing "more than words" but bloody Sharlene scored 99 singing "my heart will go on"! Unbelievable because of the following reasons: it's the crappiest song ever; Celine Dion is the 2nd crappiest singer after Michael Bolton; if you've heard Sharlene sing ... well you would have a good hearty laugh :) hehehehehe. Anyways, it was a good night, topped off with an appreciative send-off ;p
    Sunday was Mandy's bday celebrations @ Liberty Grove which reminded me of a cool Sim-Community! We ate more snags, meat and meat, played a bit of bball and softball. I've forgotten how much I used to love playing softball. The feel of nice sweaty mits in your hand and sliding to 1st base. Afterwards, a few of us went over to Cripple-Clinton's to help out with some editing. It's looking very good but for the lack of time problem.

    So there's a quick synopsis of my weekend. Isn't it weird how sometimes you can be soooo busy and yet remained unsatisfied?
    This week marks the start of touch football and the Anzac long weekend, after which I will be heading down to Melbourne for a training course. And ooo ooo Kill Bill II comes out this week!

    Okay, it is with much trepidation that I upload the following file containing the footage of my "borocca test" where the aim was to hold a mouthful of borocca and water without allowing any of it fizzling out. So to appease my subconscious, I have decided to take it down at the end of this week - so if you miss out, you MISS OUT! Watch out for Fiona's and Sharlene's footage (after I get permission) in the coming days.
    Gimme a look. Probably a good idea to "save target as" in this instance and turn up the volume. Disclaimer: I was only slighly hurt in the shooting of this video. Warning: the file is quite big and may be a bit disturbing.

    Thursday, April 15, 2004

    Sad Hurty!

    I am addicted to The Sims! Stayed up til 1:30am playing it last night ... not good.
    The number of times I stood in front of the mirror to practice my "charisma", and worked out on my $500 bench press machine is harrowing. It's like tomagotchi gone crazy!!! I now understand why Doctor Evil was so protective over Mini-Me. My sim HAS to succeed so I can live vicariously through it - har!

    The joys of a shortened working week. Isn't April fantastic? About one more week before I have to hit the books again. And WOOHOOO, we are playing KGV next competition again. Am going to make my sim into a world famous basketball player that can dance like Britney Spears, giggle like Julia Gulia, kick ass like Jennifer Garner and articulate like Felicity (but a bit better).

    Must catch train now ... bye!

    Wednesday, April 14, 2004

    Stating the Obvious Flash: I am back!

    Hello World!
    How have you all survived without the daily, sometimes triweekly Marissaisms? I dare to imagine that most have not even realised the departure of the fat-headed one. In fact, it was probably a welcomed break from all the Marissa-whinging. Ooo how many times can I fit Marissa in this paragraph? Ok enough luvoness.

    Well this morning's entirety has been spent trying to exterminate and banish a crappy virus (or an ad trojan as Gregan technically refers to it as ... sif there is a difference?) from my P.C. OhMyGosh! The frustration! Compounding this frustration is the fact that our I.T department is just bloody hopeless. The camel's penis1 I was talking to last night spent 30 minutes only to come to the conclusion that I needed to run a virus scan! That's 30 minutes worth of whinging I missed out on! Surprise surprise the virus scan did jack shit and APU2 I had to ring my PITM3 - Gregan. Gregan, if you are reading this - you are an untapped genius! Thanks a trojanillion - har!

    So the question remains, how did I inflict my P.C with such evilness? I suspect it was when I was looking up cheats for The Sims Bustin' Out. I think I am addicted to that game. I have downloaded and printed out pages worth of cheats & walkthrus. I am determined for my sims to have kids by the end of the week.

    So let's recap last week shall we?

    As some may know, I was in Queensland for the majority of last week. We stayed opposite Kirra Beach which is near Coolangatta. Kirra Beach is a sight to be seen - one of the most beautiful beaches I have encountered. The waves are perfect, the water was so warm, the sand was soft, crowd was minimal to none, and the beach itself is quite long. I had a ripper of a time, which makes the reality of work that much harder to deal with. Amongst the activities were:

    Golf @ Brookwater & Royal Pines Resort
    The former is designed by Greg Norman and the latter is the home of the Australian Ladies Masters - company I should really not be associated with. Nevertheless, managed to score a birdie somewhere in the 38 holes but ultimately was hammered by Sharlene and lost the stroke play competition4. Oh the shame! Monkey trophy slips through fingers again. But apparently it is being turned into the wooden spoon prize soon so I guess it's got my name written all over it now. Highlights were the GPRS system and the eski full of ice for your drinks on the golf carts ... and oh yeah my 8 iron shot on the par 3 - SO SWEET!

    Movie World
    All I can say is "Doo the Ride"! The Scooby Doo Ride was fantastic, possibly better than the Lethal Weapon Ride5. All the big fluffy cartoon characters were being mauled by crappy little kids, leaving no room for the older generation. It's not fair really ... I didn't get a chance to be felt up by Porky Pig as was the case the last time I visited Movie World. Found out the reason why people feel nauseous after rides is because of calcium deposits in their head.6 Highlight was trying to pull sped faces every time we go pass the camera on the rides. There were some CLASSIC shots!

    Jupiters Casino
    After a torrid affair with the buffet (such a love/hate relationship) which left everybody feeling ill and nauseous (not due to the calcium build-up), we hit the casino to try and redeem the $$ we spent on golf. After a promising start (I think everybody was up at least $20), we all ended up losing money. Though I think I faired out quite well. I lost $100 on blackjack but made back $90 on the pokies with only a 20cent bet!

    Big 2 and Beer
    We consumed a lot of bottles of alcohol by the end of our trip, though I think Shar must have drunk half of it with the way she was swigging her beer. Had Big 2 tournaments every night and Ultimate Loser was either Fiona or Shar (the former by virtue of the fact that she really sux at the 5-10 game). Highlight was the CLASSIC borocca footage - will have to post some of them online - where you have to hold a mouthful of borocca + water without letting it dribble out. Very hard when everybody around you is cracking up.

    Big Pineapple, Nostalgia Town
    Funny how there aren't any pineapple products at the Big Pineapple. The business development person there should really look into that! Nostalgia Town7 was very gay! So much gayer than the Leylon Brothers if you've ever been there.

    New bikini! New boardies! New wet suit top! 5% fatter! and 15% tanner!
    New found annoyance for China-women in white jump suits with undies that are clearly visible, who don't shut up nor sit down during flights.

    Miscellaneous Since Trip
  • Attacked by City Rail worker again (albeit not BITCH lady) for using a $20 note to pay for a $2.20 ticket. Is my money non-Australia money or something? I seriously start of the day with such low self-esteem because of these people.
  • Lost mixed bball finals last night, was yet again was bump and grinded upon - eeeeeeackkkkkk!
  • Lost H.O.R.S.E to Mindy of all people! We are officially living in an alternative universe!

    Happy Birthday
    Duane (13th April)
    Mandy (15th April)
    Le Chaddy (16th April)


    1. Dude
    2. As Per Usual
    3. Personal I.T Man
    4. Fiona and me vs. Sharlene and Wayne
    5. which we sat on 3 times.
    6. Refer to Dr Y.D. Goh.
    7. or Nostaltragic Town as I call it.
  • Monday, April 05, 2004

    News Flash: Marissa's Universe will be on hiatus for a week until 11 April ...

    ... on the account of being at the Gold Coast for a mini-holiday. Itinery thus far consists of: golf (x2), Dream World, Jupiters Casino, St Arnou Brewery (really looking forward to this one), beach, Ripley's Believe-It-Or-Not (I choose Not), pub crawl. Hopefully the trip will live up to mild-expectations.

    Was kinda excited about this trip but now all these 'to-do' things have popped up, leaving me with plenty of anxiety and lotsa loose ends! Grrrrr. To top things off, KGV bball comp for next season is full which means I cannot play basketball. My life is OVER! There is no point to my existence anymore. What is life if there is no basketball? Oh the existential issues!

    Last dragon boat race for the season occurred on Saturday @ Penrith. I think many people would define the day as a successful one considering we took out 5 categories. That's an entire hand baby! I must say though, the most satisfying race was the women's final, where we won by only 0.04 seconds. Now that's winning by a whisker (literally)! I have to grab someone's arm every time I watch the footage on Clinton's camera ... it was THAT close. There were tears of joy when they announced the results on the P.A. system. It was rather emotional watching some of the girls cry, although not being able to play bball next season is making me shed tears now!

    To celebrate a successful day, we decided to go to Mocha. Man! It took so much effort to come back out again, bearing in mind that we had been awake since 5:45am. Thanks to some 'connections' via Jpeg/PDF aka Tif, we managed to get in the V.I.P line and enter the club for freeeeeee (my kinda word). Oh my goodness, there were some interesting people that night! We had this black dude wearing an eskimo-type parker when it was clearly too humid to do so (black ppl can make anything look cool though); this white chick that was fully dancing like Britney Spears with her black boyfriend (she was sooooo good! I was transfixed for a good 10 minutes); random weirdo guys invading our 'Asian' circle (yes we were the only people dancing in a circle); Paris Hilton look-alike, with the tiniest pink dress to match; bomb funk MC-free-styler type dancers doing battle-dancing (very cool to watch). Anyways, by end of the night, I was sooooo buggered that I ended up sleeping in the car outside my house because I was too tired to walk into my house.

    Which brings me to today. Did a health assessment test this morning. Part of the test involved doing a fitness test where you had to the step test for 3 minutes. An excellent result is <85 heart beats per minute for a person my age. Guess what I got? 132 heart beats per minute!!! This equates to a POOR fitness level. After a few phone calls, the lady realised that she made me do too many steps per minute. No wonder I was puffing and huffing so much! Other than that, cholesterol, blood glucose and waist to hip ratio are all good, though blood pressure is a tad low and she said "we can work on the amount of sugar in your breakfast foods". Teeeheehehe. Guess the red bean bun and the usual peanut butter & kaya don't help.

    Okay, need to tie up a few more loose ends. Happy Easter all.

    Friday, April 02, 2004

    To add to my woes, mp3-project is DOWN! What is the world coming to? (Presumably a world of anti-illegal software distribution)

    It's been a shit pile of a week. Visions of glitzy red-carpet week (on the account of not having to study - yay!) have officially been torn asunder. Why? Well sometimes life is just very hard to contend with. If I was on Days of Our Lives at the moment, the slogan would be 'these are the FUTILE days of our lives', but I would consider keeping Stefano and Sammy because they are too evil to discard.

    Issues Issues Issues! *sigh* Ok, enough sad sack whingies.
    It has been brought to my attention that I seem to attract certain unwanted behaviour.
    Example 1: Amidst the excitement of it all, I forgot to mention that during the 'private' (note inverted comas) golf lesson with Boy Robin, he decided to prove some point he was trying to make by THROWING A GOLF BALL AT ME! Furthermore, he told me to look away first and then proceeded to hurl the ball at my direction. Who does that? What kind of golf teaching method is this? How could that possibly prove ANY kind of point? From memory, I think he was trying to use that analogy to say something along the lines of 'you can't hit the ball if you can't see it'. HUH?? Really?? Surely not ...
    Example 2: Some tall white camel's penis (i.e. dude) decided to cork me in the thigh during basketball. Now there's a huge lump growing out of my right thigh which is causing me to walk (rather than run) like a Wally. I think he just couldn't handle the thought of me BURNING him to the hoop, therefore he had to take me down. ;p

    It has also been brought to my attention that the reason I am never awake on the train ride into work is because of my choice of breakfast foods. My morning meal consists of Kaya and Peanut Butter on 2 pieces of bread *drool* (or occasionally Nutella if I am in a chocolate mood). Effectively I am consuming coconut milk, egg, sugar and fat that amounts to about 60% of my daily fat intake. Anyways, the hypothesis is that there is so much sugar/fat in my daily breakfast routine that it is sending me to sleep about 15 minutes after consumption. Could be entirely possible. But how could you refuse the temptation of kaya & peanut butter?

    Merrick & Rosso had a skit on their show the other time called "Unfortunate Name Town". It was hilarious! Especially considering we were talking about Julia Gulia the other day. They had names like Paige Turner and Teresa Green (try pronouncing it with an American/Canadian accent).
    Am looking on eBay for a 'memory foam pillow'. Figured I have to look after my neck/back from now on. Since the last entry, I have visited both the physio and acupuncturist again. Been on a crazy spending spree: golf, Gold Coast holiday, and New Zealand skiing trip. Does anybody out there wanna come to NZ and leave with me on the 11 Sept? (Please read entry on 17 March for vital clue.) Leave me a msg on my comments thing ;p

    And for those that are up-to-date with the bball comps (only Gregan I think), we won both the mixed and women's, and next week is SEMIS ... ooo ahhhhh! Unfortunately I will be in QLD so hopefully I will get to play in the finals when I come back.