Marissa's Universe

Tokyo - Pocchari Edition

2010-03-08T01:39:00.010+11:00

Our day started in Harajuku - it was terribly wet, dreary and cold. The 100 yen store supplied us with eight 100 yen umbrellas. As with most Japanese things, they were both practical and stylish. Due to the horrible weather, there were no Harajuku teens congregated around the Jingu Bridge.

The rain however was not to deter our shopping efforts given Harajuku is renowned for being the fashion capital of the world for unique street fashion. I had great success having found a pair of anpanman socks! Squee! I'll let you know soon if it actually fits my feet. My feet are on the giant side in Japan - could not find any shoes that fit in Uniqlo Shoes. Speaking of Uniqlo, the boys went Uniqlo crazy, visiting no less than 2 stores today. I suspect that we will also be going to the Ginza Uniqlo tomorrow.

Crepes are a must-do when when strolling down Takeshita Street.

We then eventually made our way to Akihabara, with intentions to try world famous Kyushu Jangara Ramen, and dine at a maid cafe.

The most popular dish at Kyushu Jangara Ramen is the thin noodle, pork based broth with the lot (number 1a). I am not a pork fan, so I went for 2a - miso based soup with the lot. The verdict? Probably one of the best ramen I've ever tasted. It really was good, particularly on a cold, wet night. Be warned though, you could be in for a long wait.

Probably the most exciting and interesting part of the day was the maid cafe. There are a number of 'maids' loitering on street paths inviting passersby (usually targeting men) to come into their maid cafes for more intimate, fun, personal frivolity. Here's a re-enactment ...

By some bizarre twist of event, we ended up in a maid cafe that catered for clientele that has a pocchari (meaning chubby, slightly plump) interest (I don't really want to use the word fetish, because that will degrade the whole experience). The cafe itself was located in a darkish alley, away from the main street, where I suspect the more traditional (or less pocchari) maid cafes conduct their business.

We walked in hesitantly, but with a sense of wonder and ordered 4 coffees - luckily we had Ken (sorry Ken, named and shamed) with us who could read the Japanese menu.

We giggle, marveled and people watched for 30 minutes. It is a fascinating environment, and there is quite a lot of social and cultural commentary I could make about the experience. However, in the interest of brevity, I will say that this: there is nothing overtly sexual about the concept. It genuinely felt like the maids were there just to provide fun company and engage in a bit of friendly, harmless conversation. Sure they were making attempts to shower you with attention, but a lot of the patrons in the joint looked like they really needed it. The experience cost us about 1000 yen each (around $10 AUD). Part of our bill included a photo with your favourite maid (favourite pocchari maid in our case). They insisted that we all do the cat pose, and kept yelling directions of 'meow meow, meow meow, meow meow' from behind the camera. It was hilarious - yes even more hilarious than Ken's awkward face.

Oh, and I find it disturbing that my face is as pocchari (if not more) as the pocchari maid ...

Tokyo

2010-03-07T05:01:00.004+11:00

We have rounded out the snowboarding part of our Japan 2010 trip, and today we spend the day in transit from Rusutsu, to Sapporo and then finally to Tokyo.

The journey was hard going on the now haggard body - there are more than a few weary and sore limbs and muscles in the group.

We are staying in a fairly swish hotel in Shinjuku - Citadines Hotel for those that are looking for affordable, spacious and nice accommodation in a major hub. The highlight of the day was the traditional Japanese dinner at Ukai Toriyama Restaurant which is about 50 minutes from Shinjuku. The setting was beautiful - it presented as self sustained village amongst lush gardens, narrow paths, stepping stones, fancy footbridges, mini water falls, ponds, koi fish. Each dining party has its own room/private dining area, most built with traditional materials, i.e. wood, bamboo, stone, mud walls, tatami mats and washi screens. And this is before we got to the FOOD! The food was sublime. My favourite was the red bean mochi - yum yum YUM.

Unfortunately, the battery in my camera died, probably due to the cold weather, so this photo of the gang will suffice for now.

Rusutsu Resort

2010-03-05T22:02:00.005+11:00

We have been at Rusutsu Resort for the past 3 days. To describe Rusutsu in a few words, think: Bellagio + Dreamworld + Snow Resort. A few of the novelties here include: amusement park, arcade, roller coaster, water slide, wave pool, musical fountains, monorail, pony rides, caramel making etc etc ...

We are staying on snow, in a lodge which is positioned directly adjacent to a ski lift. The only downside to the lodge is that there is 1 bathroom between 8 people! Luckily most of us are making full use of the public bath/onsen.

The snow at Rusutsu has been above average. The runs are long and wide, and pockets of powder can always be found on the edges of trails. There are a lot of school kids at Rusutsu, all in their school jumpsuit kit.

Ok, short entry, need to hit the onsen. We pack our bags tonight and its onwards to Tokyo tomorrow morning. I shall leave you with a few pictures from Rusutsu, and our fun tubing experience.

And when in Japan ... do what the Japanese do:

Wandering Sapporo

2010-03-03T00:47:00.005+11:00

We spent the day wandering about Sapporo, and hitting the usual staples of Japanese shopping and culture including:

A pet store with unbearably cute puppies ... and some not so cute puppies

Bic Camera - you can take a picture with just a blink of an eye with this particular camera

Expensive Fruit Shops - approximately $35 for one rockmelon! Now I feel bad about the rockmelon that is rotting in my fridge.

Subway - check out the mirrors next to the doors. Tell me this is not a great a idea!

Not to mention food halls, moss burger, seven ereven, Lawsons, and of course Anpanman shopping:

Off to Rusutsu tomorrow. Wish my shoulder good luck ...

First Skidoo Experience

2010-03-02T11:20:00.005+11:00

The powder was pretty epic on our last day at Kiroro (popurar ... particurary).

Unfortunately, I was the powder 'buzz killer' for the rest of the group. I crashed at high speed on the freshly groomed, aptly named 'power run' run. Kenneth (prematurely) flagged for the emergency medics, lots of fuss ensued ... and then I was on a skidoo back down the mountain. I ticked the 'overconfidence' option on the form I had to fill out at the medic centre.

I have to get ready ... I will pass over to Sharlene:

Hmm, what to say, that Marissa hasn't already. She has probably torn her rotator cuff, as said by Dr YDG. So, it was not as serious as first thought, but she did hear a *crack* when she went down.

Have to say, the snow was awesome! So awesome, that we dared to go through the trees. I got up, close and personal with a skinny trunk. I think I came off worse, hence the tree not budging, and me adding a bruise to my list of injuries.

Okay, have to go, we're in Sapporo now, taking a two day break of eating and shopping, before heading to Rusutsu resort for a few more days of snow.

Bye!
Sharlene

Kiroro - Day 2

2010-02-28T23:06:00.004+11:00

I am going to rely on pixels to tell the story of Day 2 Kiroro.

To be clear, the intention was to spell out "Kiroro" in the following picture.

Oh and YATTA! Success with the 100 yen anpanman machine. Not only did we get the red bean man himself, we also scored the 50th anniversary edition anpanman in a cake! Sugoi! Let's not mention that we managed to empty out the machine, and the fact that we were desperate enough to ask the hotel staff to open up the machine for us. But it was fate and destiny . Hotel staff didn't have the key, and the very next spin gave us the elusive anpanman. My holiday is now complete.

I shall leave you with Kiroro carnage.

Kiroro - Riding - Day 1

2010-02-28T01:45:00.000+11:00

First day of riding today; snow condition was abominable for Japan standards. Some sections of the mountain were, dare I say it, Thredbo-like. Eek.
On the upside, the runs were empty and queues were non-existent. In fact, the only people en masse we had to contend with was at the breakfast buffet. The runs are long and wide, and there were still sections of the mountain with decent snow. My new boots held up well. Not sure how my toenail-less big toe held up though. It could be suffering badly under the 2 layers of sports tape and 1 layer of bandaid. I might muster the courage to open it up tomorrow.

The litter of beer vending machines strategically positioned at popular (or should I say popurar) rest stops is also a luxury to most, and a necessity to some (we call the latter drunks).

Dinner was, surprise surprise, a buffet. The cold dishes (raw prawns, snow crab, salmon sashimi, squid etc) was oishii! Queen of buffet YDG yet again brought her B-game(i.e. Buffet Game). She murdered the buffet.

My quest for anpanman magnet continues. I have added another 3 to the collection since the following photograph was taken. I'm starting to think that there is no anpanman is that dodgy 100 yen machine. I'm about to clean it out!?!?

Kiroro Snow World

2010-02-27T02:49:00.000+11:00

We actually found the auction room at the Fish Markets (too) early this morning. Unfortunately, we couldn't stay for the actual auction since we had a domestic plane to catch ... bound for Kiroro Snow World.

We are staying at the Kiroro Mountain Hotel. It is a ski-in-ski-out resort hotel. This is my first ski-in-ski-out experience. Amongst many other advantages, we can now spend longer loitering around the breakfast buffet. I just have to get rid of this gastritis first - azuki bun waits for no buildup of gastic juices!

However, resort hotel means resort prices. A half a litre can of Asahi has inflated from 320 yen (~$3.50) to 420 yen ($~4.50). Guess you win some and you lose some.

Story behind pictures:
1) Massacred tuna @ fish markets
2) Signs designed to confused tourists
3) Anpanman drinking Fire coffee - read the description
4) Anpanman at Kiroro

Sent via BlackBerry® from Telstra

Annual Japan Snow Fix - 2010

2010-02-26T02:11:00.004+11:00

After a sleepless night (basketball finals plus celebrations drink plus last minute packing equals no sleep) and yet another Jetstar debacle - they actually cancelled our 6am flight; no warning, no prior announcment, nothing! - we arrived to 15 degree weather in Japan.

I do love Japan. She excites the sense, yet brings order to chaos. She is a living, breathing example of juxtaposition at work.

We are heading out at 4am to visit the Fish Markets in Tokyo tomorrow, then is onwards to Sapporo.

A few photos to finish off.

Being in Japan means the revival of anpanman references:

Warning - the following content may be offensive to some viewers
Haven't even hit the mountains yet, and already injuries to report.

Metaphysical Studies

2010-02-05T17:59:00.000+11:00

2010 is the year for me to indulge in metaphysical studies - these were the instructions from a bona fide, for real feng shui master; thanks YDG for the freebie, bulbous fruit (because they are lucky) filled seminar invite.

In fact, my foray into metaphysical studies had already begun prior to this edict. For some subliminally unknown reason, one of my 2010 resolutions was to dabble with yoga and meditation.

So here is the running list (accompanied by trivial commentary) of kooky activities on my check list so far:

Yoga
The amount of clothing you wear is inversely related to your yogi-seriousness level, i.e. the more clothing the less serious you are - I fall in this category). Full-on yogis seem to wear next to nothing. There is always one (male) groaner in the class. The male yoga instructors have the best physiques ... one in particular, and he knows my name! Now that's incentive to keep turning up to class.

Feng shui
Year of the metal tiger. The best advice is to stay away from people born in the year of the monkey (that's you 80's baby). Oh and fill your rooms with salt lamps and air purifiers.

Meditation
Meditation book sitting on my best side table - thanks Gregan.

Kinesiology
Apparently I eat too many carrots? And my chronic neck/shoulder pains is actually a manifestation of some deep seated mental blocker that may or may not have happened 4 years ago. Duh. Isn't everything related to mental instability?

Blue Moon .. and Mars in Opposition
Yup you could really delve into that header, but to be clear, I mean Mars the planet. Here is my digi cam photo of the rare event that occurred on 30 January 2010. The blurb from astroblog: "This Saturday Mars is at opposition, where it is biggest and brightest as seen from Earth. It is also the night of the "Blue" Moon, and the Moon this night will have the largest apparent diameter of the year. So all in all a good night." You might have to look really hard (potentially with the help of a microscope) to see Mars in my picture. It is to the left of the Blue Moon.

But guess what, there will be another Blue Moon on 30 March 2010. Perhaps it will be a cosmic year after all.

Annual Japan trip coming up next week, this time with added company of KS-personnel. Can't wait to get boozy every day on those $2.20 Asahis. Oh the snow will be nice too. W00t!

Road Trip

2010-01-24T13:31:00.000+11:00

We are accompanying the BMW 335i on its quest to rack up enough kilometres to escape FBT damage. How does this sit with my renewed go green/eco-button outlook? Let's leave it as a rhetorical question shall we.

We stopped by Canberra yesterday and squeezed in the Masterpieces exhibition and Canberra Caps vs. Sydney Flames basketball game. Studying the artworks has given me resolve to sign off on my creations (should they ever be immortalised) using the FULL year, rather than just the last 2 digits. And why is it that all these legendary artists were marred with such insufferable doubt.

The caps vs. flames game was a cracker. It went into O.T with LJ hitting a game winning 3 to get her team up down the stretch. As expected, I made the gang loiter around after game while I go through my fan-girl/stalking for photos process. However, I think the fangirl stage of my life is drawing nigh, given that everybody around me, including the players, were half my age.

Best part of the night was catching with our friend Millie. It was so great to see here again ... she is still so gentle, caring and ever so diplomatic (well she does work for government). She really did warm my heart.

Onwards to Melbourne.

Sent via BlackBerry® from Telstra

Price of Oil in Dubai

2010-01-20T00:48:00.005+11:00

I suppose it is about time I started sorting my The MEAT photos. I am hopeless with filing and cataloguing photos. My SD card full of THe MEAT photos remains untouched (until today), almost like it has some kind of awful disease.

Came across this picture which gives you a sense of how unnecessarily cheap oil is in Dubai.

For background, 1 Dirham = approx $0.30 AUD; 1 gallon = 3.79 litres.

The calculation works out to be approx $0.49/litre. Hmmmmmm

Sun-Kissed Tattoos

2010-01-06T18:33:00.003+11:00

End of the naughties, start of 'the Tens'. If it were a numbers game, this should be an excellent decade for yours truly given No.10 is my number of choice. That gives me 10 years to get it vaguely right.

Our farewell to the naughties was ceremoniously bizarre and quirky. We wound up at Mingara Recreational Club in Tumbi Umbi on the (false) information that we could oooh and aaah at the Central Coast version of midnight fireworks from the club. Wrong. and Fail. But there was a fake Elvis shaking things up.

The only semblance of fireworks I saw was the 15 free spins from my lucky pyramid pokie machine. While I won enough to pay a small cheese burger meal, others were not so lucky. Mingara is now entrenched in KS vernacular, and can be used to replace terms such as 'ripped off', 'dodgy', or can be simply be used as exclamations e.g. you Mingara!

Aside from Mingara and sleep, the rest of our waking hours were spent playing golf - now that's Mingara'd! We played 3 rounds of golf in 3 days. I ended 2009 with a crap golf game, and I started 2010 in the same fashion with the added eyesore of hideous tan lines. I officially have a natural Michael Jackson white glove on my left hand.

Nice.

* Asterisked Disclaimer

2009-12-21T23:33:00.001+11:00

It is time pare back the Anpanman references and restore whatever minuscule credibility this blog has left. The Anpanman addiction reared its ugly head and started taking casualties when I blurted nonchalantly at YDG's bday lunch "winning Anpanman was the best thing that has happened to me this year". By the reaction on the faces of a few of the people sitting around the table, this evidently came as some sort of anthrax-laced bombshell.

This entry will therefore serve as the belated asterisked disclaimer to that flippant statement, and a timely occasion to lament on the nostalgia of the Middle East /African Trip (The MEAT). Interestingly, The MEAT conveniently became The MET on the way back into Australia - customs seem to be far more obtrusive when African countries are involved.

More than 2 months have passed since The MEAT - and yes I acknowledge respectfully that Dubai, Egypt and Jordan are Muslim countries and so the acronym may be slightly 'cute'. My very cool, very dear friends (and one in particular) had organised The MEAT as a surprise for my age-that-shall-not-be-mentioned birthday. They even went to the trouble of masking it as The Indian Trip (TIT); a fake itinerary was produced and award winning faux enthusiasm for 24/7 curry was on display. Suffice to say that the surprise came undone quite early on in the piece - it's okay Shar, my supreme detective skills would have achieved the same end result.

The MEAT née TIT (okay that's the last of the acronyms I promise) was (and I don't use the next word lightly) perfect. It had a little bit of everything: reverence, relevance, grandeur, gaudiness, history, culture, shopping, cruisy days, hectic days, thought provoking moments, superficial entertainment, new found friends, lasting friends. The experience is nicely captured in Paul Theroux's “Dark Star Safari”:

“The pleasantest aspect of the river cruise was the combination of gourmandizing and sightseeing, gliding with the current and stopping every now and then at a resurrected ruin.”

A couple of things held true throughout the two and a bits weeks of travelling: 1) constant gorging of food; and 2) the realisation that it is quite a blessing to have a mix of good natured buddies with complementary dispositions to travel the globe with.

Yes, the MEAT surpassed all expectations. KS - you guys rock - thanks for giving me the best entry ticket to your old fogey party. Oh, and the other weedy surprise party wasn't bad either. I really shouldn't be allowed to complain for the rest of this year.

I'm not sure whether it is a bad omen that my actual birth day was:
- the longest day ever;
- in Dubai, which now has total debts worth approximately $59 billion USD; and
- I had blisters on my feet.

A mention of our 3rd time unlucky basketball finals. Mindy took some good shots. A sample shown below. Her other sets can be found here. Thanks to the usual crew for the support.

Playing with Food

2009-12-12T23:57:00.003+11:00

There were some creative juices flowing during dinner.

This is our ETS inspired beef shank.

Conquered

2009-10-31T13:44:00.005+11:00

This guy was worth every cent of other people's hard earnt $35. Fitting that it was ME ME ME that conquered the MAXI CLAW. I would love to boast that it came down to my supreme skill and dexterity that nabbed the sucker, but nay, it was the combination of mathematical probability and an element of kismet that led to the rare sticky grip of the Maxi Claw.

In 3 crisp moments of palpitating excitement:

... Lucifer-Anpanman was secured, in a dignified way (i.e. face up), in the 3 pronged Maxi Claw.

... an eternity of doubtful reservations yet secret hopes - we've been burnt before - as we watched, with our faces pressed against the glass walls, Lucifer-Anpanman wobble his way along the treacherous route.

... pause, pause, pause

.... *insert pandemonium and school girl screams that are way too inappropriate for 30 year olds*

No footage of the actual manoeuvre, but the aftermath of the excitement was captured.

This fella is so big, that I mistook him for an intrusive stranger when I caught a glimpse of him on my couch.

Suckers for Punishment

2009-10-29T15:23:00.005+11:00

We succumbed to the allure of Big-Head-Lucifer-Anpanman/Maxi-Claw Machine again (the word 'maxi' conjures up thoughts of sanitary pads ... with wings. Redbull!).

After burning $25 worth of attempts with no prize to show, it is safe to conclude that we have been comprehensively DEFEATED by the Maxi Claw Machine. We probably could have convinced the vendors to sell us the damn toy for $25.

Our attempts were again captured on video. The first one is slightly lengthy but worth the viewing just to hear:

Shar's weird comment: "maybe you need to grab it at the neck". Hey Shar, Anpanman doesn't have a neck!
the school girls screams at the 1.20 minute mark.

Blackout

2009-10-25T23:21:00.004+11:00

Live Broadcast.

Blackout!

This is a slightly scary experience especially since I am so ill-equipped.

My top 6 list for surviving a sudden blackout:
1) Leave laptop with big bright screen running.
2) Light my one and only (scented) candle.
3) Check outside to see if street lights are still on.
4) Get friend on the phone in case it is a murder/robbery attempt
5) Check safety switch to see if it has been activated.
6) Blog

Such darkness.

Collage of moment from this weekend. Picasa is rather cool.

Heavy Head thwarts jaws of Victory

2009-10-15T18:18:00.000+11:00

It was a normal Thursday lunch, on a normal (albeit slightly windy and underwhelming) day.

A casual whim to take a stroll to Capitol Square to search for an iPod cover (not mine - haven't quite gotten past my iTunes frustrations yet) turned out to be quite the adventure. Safely tucked away upstairs, amidst the jungle of cartoon/cute toys wannabes was ...

ANPANMAN - with an evil suit on.

The odds were against us, and at $1 per go, Lucifer-anpanman seemed even more elusive. This roused our propensity to take on the improbable odds ... and building crowd of 3.

...

In the end, his massive head proved too powerful.

Dead Sea

2009-09-26T19:27:00.008+10:00

So I've come down with a flu bug of some sort. Timing wise, I guess this is probably the best time to get sick (if sickness was mandatory), i.e. at the end of a trip.

The Middle East adventure has reached its finale and is quickly coming to an end. Yesterday's itinerary was again FULL ON. We packed in the Dead Sea, Madaba (best known for a large Byzantine-era mosaic map of The Holly Land), Karak Castle (an ancient Crusader stronghold) and Mt Nebo (burial place of Moses). Dead Sea was definitely an interesting experience. The Dead Sea is famous for the extreme salinity (33.7%, or 9 times that of the ocean) - a result of the high evaporation rate that occurs in that particular location. Many white salt crystals are actually visible on the shoreline. You don't swim so much in the Dead Sea; the more accurate description is bob. The water is so buoyant that balancing can get tricky - quite an unusual sensation.

Because the Dead Sea is the lowest point on Earth (at 1,300 feet below sea level), it is closest to all the deep Earth's minerals e.g. chloride salts of magnesium, sodium, potassium, bromine. Combined with the low U.V and the higher atmospheric pressure, the Dead Sea is believed to have special healing and cosmetic uses. This explains the liberal use and application of the mud by tourists.

More about the other 'highlights' another time

Red Sea, Wadi Rum and Petra

2009-09-26T14:32:00.002+10:00

The itinerary in Jordan over the past couple days has been FULL ON. Early starts and late finishes.

Given that we are on a windy bus ride (on route to the Dead Sea for yes, another buffet lunch and then a swim), brevity is in order.

We arrived via a hydrofoil service from Egypt (Nuweiba, where I experienced the worst toilet on this trip) to Jordan (Aqaba). The sea sickness tablet completely knocked me out so I can't give you any insights about the hydrofoil or the journey. After a buffet dinner, we headed out to Petra By Night. Petra, also referred to as the rose-red city is located deep inside a narrow desert gorge and holds the remains of the once lost Nabataean city. Most people will recognise Petra from the last scene of 'Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade', specifically the Treasury (see photos 1 and 2). To get to the Treasury, you must walk through the towering siq walls. The siq was formed as a result of tectonic plate movement - the massive boulders on either side of the siq path actually match up like a jig-saw puzzle. The siq is about 2kms and leads you to the Treasury. However, Petra is much more than the siq and the Treasury. In ancient times, Petra was a city admired for its refined culture, incredible architecture and ingenious complex of dams and water channels. We spent all of yesterday exploring Petra. There was a lot of walking and a lot of sun and sweating. We covered around 10kms and managed to see the Monastery (see picture 3) and the tombs (carved into the mountain sides). There were still more things to explore but by 3.30pm (we started at 8am), our feet/legs went on strike.

The reward for a long tiring day was at turkish bath - sauna, a full body scrub and a bit of a massage.

We also did some snorkeling in the Red Sea (not to be confused with the Dead Sea) at Aqaba a few days ago. The corals started very close to the shoreline so most of us are sporting some nice coral cuts/gashes. My left calf looks like I've had a run in with Wolverine. There sea floor was also littered with sea urchins (spiky little suckers). Our Canadian friend managed to stand on one 5 minutes into the snorkel. He now has 8 urchin spikes on his foot. They are supposed to dissolve with time, but walking with spikes in your foot is not fun - I had a few on my heel.
Wadi rum was also on our itinerary, but I'm feeling car sick so I'm gonna stop.

Mt Sinai

2009-09-23T01:34:00.002+10:00

Wake up call was at 1am this morning. A door knocker with heavy fists (perhaps the fists of God) cane around and bashed on our door. Wearily, we got ourselves geared up for the trek up Mt Sinai.

Mt Sinai is synonymous with Moses and the 10 commandments - the laws that God gave to the Israelites. The summit is 2285 metres from sea level. The buffet style living was not conducive to this kind of hiking!

There are 2 routes available for the pilgrimage up/down the mountain:

- the longer and shallower camel path (approximately 2.5 hours on foot, 4kms uphill and walkers & camels share the path; or

- the 3,750 Steps of Repentance in the ravine behind the monastery, laid by one monk as a form of repentence

The last part to the summit, which everybody has to do, is a steep incline consisting of 300 steps.

We took the camel path up and the Steps of Repentance down. Our trek began at 2.30am. The only light available was the halogen beams from our torches, and the bright stars that shone down on us (Orion's belt has never been so bright). Half of the group opted for camels, and the others (including yours truly) toughed it out on foot on the camel path. Every so often, a camel would pop out of nowhere, and every so often there would be a camel/human traffic jam or a camel/human/camel sandwich. It was quite a surreal experience. The path was not smooth at all - littered with uneven rocks, pebbles and camel poop. The hike to the summit is made that much harder with the hundreds of tourists/pilgrims that share the path; all rushing up to see the sunrise at 5.40am. Amazingly, there were quite a lot of older people (with walking sticks and all) doing the hike. I have to say, the hike was not easy, so I was super impressed with their will power and perseverance.

Mt Sinai is Bedouin country (original habitants). Bedouins are out in full force during the trek - leading the camels, leading the walking groups, loitering on various points on the climb selling camel services. Our Bedouon was a young boy. He does the entire trek 4 times a week!

We took the Steps of Repentance down the mountain. I think the legs started shaking at about step 500. At least we escaped the crowd and camels on the return journey.

Surprise surprise, a buffet breakfast awaited upon our return. After a quick shower, we headed to St Katherine's Monastery - the oldest working Christian monastery in the world. The monastery is dedicated to St Katherine, the legendary martyr of Alexandria who was tortured on a spike wheel and beheaded for her Christianity. Her body was supposedly transported by angels away and onto the the slopes of Gebel Katatina, which is 600kms from Mt Sinai. The body was found 300 years later by monks from the monastery.

St Katherine's Monastery is also the place where you will find the burning bush from which God spoke to Moses. The bush that exits today (see last picture) is a descendant of the original burning bush.

We are now waiting on the hydrofoil bound for Jordan. The immigration/visa process was a slight nightmare and not very clean. Hopefully there will be no sea sickness.

Back in Cairo - Bound for Mt Sinai

2009-09-21T17:51:00.005+10:00

We took the overnight sleeper train from Aswan back to Cairo today. The ride was even bumpier than the original journey, and smooth breaking was not a skill they taught in Egypt train driving school.

Our time in Aswan ended very nicely with a felucca sail around the Nile for a few hours. Also risked suffering extreme diarrhoea and swam in the dirty Nile water after a wee bit (heh) of peer pressure. It was cold and surprisingly fresh, but hard to keep afloat (fresh water).

Our 'free day' in Cairo was basically an eating tour of Cairo. Yes we did start off at the Al Azhar mosque (the oldest mosque in Cairo); a creepy guy rorted us for 20 Egyptian pounds each for a semi guided tour. He had the audacity to ask for more at the end, and then requested for pens 'for the children'. On top of that, he wanted us to lie about the 20 pounds to his superior. Presumably because a semi guided tour should cost way less!

The rorting continued when we sat down for Egyptian coffees and mango juices at a cafe well known for its interior design (mirrors) and the bazaar merchants that frequent in and out of the cafe with goods to sell. After some nifty trickery and persistence, one Ali Baba selling 'leather' foot stools rorted us with synthetic foot stools at 200 Egyptian pounds (approx $50AUD) for 3 packs. He demonstrated the authenticity of the 'leather' foot stools by lighting a flame over the material (it didn't burn). In retrospect, he was hastily rushing through the marketing and sale process.

At the point of sale, the tricky Ali Baba handed over wrapped packages that contained fake synthetic foot stools. We were wondering why he kept burning his fingers when demonstrating the flame trick. Now we realise it is because he would rather burn his thumb than the dodgy material. To add salt into the wounds, another Ali Baba selling exactly the same foot stools quoted 3 for 100 Egyptian pounds. It was at this point that we declared, as Wayne put it, "War on Egypt". We formed a search party for dodgy Ali Baba and fortuitously, both he and the 2nd Ali Baba walked past the cafe as we were heading out. It was us versus the Ali Babas. The outcome? Extra pack for free (see 4th photo); all non-leather.

We escaped an attempted pick pocketing attempt by a bunch of kids. Their strategy was: distraction and then attack. The cutest kids would come up and act cute, ask your name, dance etc. Once the cute kids secure your attention, the older uglier kids move in from behind and target the backpacks. Luckily we were on dodgy high alert and escaped unscathed.

Now on the bus bound for Mt Sinai - the bus ride will take 7 hours. We left the party half the tour group behind including the ABBA gang (Scots) and the Aussie couple. The Scots were really good value, particularly when we made them spell "Gogol Bordello" (i.e. G-O-G-O).

Abu Simbel

2009-09-20T05:30:00.003+10:00

Early start this morning (3am), destination: Abu Simbel, well known for the mammoth salvaging exercise in the 1960s to prevent the two temples (commissioned by Ramses II) from disappearing into the man-made Lake Nasser.

The original temples were carved out of the mountain on the west bank of the Nile. The creation of the world's largest artificial lake, Lake Nasser, led to the flooding of many antiquities and the near extinction of the Nubian race. Some temples did in fact disappear beneath the lake. Abu Simbel was one of the temples that was disassembled, and subsequently assembled on a higher ground. The incredible engineering rescue feat took 4 years and $40 USD. They literally cut the temples into 2000+ blocks and then reconstructed inside a specially built mountain further away from the banks of Lake Nasser. The original site where Abu Simbel temples stood has since also disappeared under Lake Nasser.

Tourists visit Abu Simbel in large guarded convoys of buses with security checkpoints every so often. The buses hooned down the 2 lane desert highways as if it was one long one way road -- it wasn't.

The temples themselves were a self created homage to Ramses II. Ramses II definitely had megalomanic tendencies. Not only did he have many large statues of himself, he also portrayed himself as a god by commissioning artworks that included Ramses II in the company and on equal footing with other gods. The carvings at Abu Simbel also depict Ramses II as a friend and ally to the Nubians. This I believe is one of the oldest example of political propaganda. Add in Ramses II's playboy ways (although not confirmed, it has been said that Ramses II had more than 60 wives.

We are now on a sleeper train to Cairo. Goodbye to Melodie for all the good times.

Kom Ombo and Aswan

2009-09-19T01:42:00.002+10:00

We meandered through the Temple of Kom Ombo in the town Kom Ombo yesterday afternoon. Kom Ombo is located on the Nile and 65kms south of Edfu

Things of note in Kom Ombo area: Kom Ombo Temple, the crocodile God Sobek, and Nubians (a near extinct indigenous dark skinned group from southern Egypt).

The dual temple of Kom Ombo is known for its symmetrical sides - left half is dedicated to the crocodile God Sobeka, and right half is dedicated to the falcon God Haroeris (see picture 2 for excellent modern day representation using only shadows). Everything in the temple is doubled and perfectly symmetrical along the main axis of the temple e.g. twin entrances, twin courts, twin hypostyle halls, double alter in the centre of the court for both gods etc.

There is also a peculiar scene on the back wall of the temple which is thought to be the first representation of medical instruments for performing surgery dating from the days of the Roman Egypt. The Nilometre was also present - a measuring device designed to measure the rise and fall of the Nile. The Nilometre takes the form of a graduated column and sits well below the level of the Nile on a paved area at the bottom of a flight of steps. More tax is levied if the level rises.

The temple visit was followed by a relaxing sit down in a sheesha and ice cream tent. In the evening, we partied Egyptian style, complete with Egyptian style clothes & accessories.

The cruise style holiday is ... well very cruisy. Buffets three times a day and itinerary can as hectic or relaxing as you make it. The food has been very good. A good mix between traditional (falafel, baklava, moussaka, kunafa, shai tea) and non-traditional (lasagne, chips). There is a mini pool on the upper deck, but it is constantly half filled, perhaps because of the evaporation? And its always interesting to socialise with such a diverse bunch of travellers, from the typical annoying Canadian loud mouth to 4 Scots that look just like ABBA.

We docked in Aswan this morning. We have so far squeezed in a walk through the bazaar and experienced a camel ride in the desert in the afternoon. The camel ride reminded me of the scene in Spaceballs just before the group collapsed from dehydration. The camels were amazingly calm and responsive. Yet again I had to swap camels (though not before nearly getting bucked off) half way through the journey. Dismounting is a scary process. They are such cute creatures and they sound like chewbacca - for real!

We are now waiting for buffet dinner and then will go see a light show at the philae temple in Aswan. 2am star tomorrow morning for Abu Simbel!

Edfu - Edfu Temple

2009-09-17T17:53:00.002+10:00

Our sail towards southern upper Egypt brought us to the town of Edfu where Edfu Temple stands.

Edfu Temple in a few simplistic words is: Horus mania. Horus is the falcon god and the son of Osiris and Isis. The story of Horus, his plight and his reign can be seen all over the temple e.g. his battle with evil Uncle Seth (also a pig/dog/hippo), his union with Hathor.

Edfu Temple is the second largest temple in Egypt after Karnak and probably the best preserved. It was built in the Ptolemaic period between 237 and 57 BC, and took 140 years to finish. Over time, the temple became buried under of 12 meters of sand and layers of river silt deposited by the Nile. It took workers 40 years to excavate and free the temple of the sand.

Interestingly, the Christians in its quest for world religion domination during the Roman Empire attempted to deface and destroy the temple by scraping the carved reliefs and burning the ceilings. The deep cuts across the wall facades and blackened ceilings are both visible.

We are now sailing down the Nile towards Kom Ombo. The buffet style breakfasts, lunches and dinners is contributing to a healthy waist line. Feel so sorry for the donkeys.

Luxor - Valley of the Kings

2009-09-17T06:48:00.001+10:00

5am wake up call for a 5.30am start to the VK - Valley of the Kings.

In a way, it was useful to start the trip with a relatively new city like Dubai, and then contrast it with Egypt which is dripped with history - and 3000 BC worth it. Dubai spoilt us with luxury; Egypt is spoiling us with sheer magnitude and reverence. The legends, the stories, the Kings and their Queens, their temples, their tombs, their plights, their successes, the homages, the language, the hieroglyphs, their symbols (Shar is now obsessed with the ankh), the food! Perhaps Egypt was the ancient version of Dubai.

We met out donkeys shortly after wake-up call. The donkeys were very small, looked malnourished but they made their way to VK very efficiently. Although, mine did decide to take a detour into the fields on the way back. That was apparently a punishable offense because I had to swap donkeys and Mohammed & Mohammed (our guides) let him/her go.

It was stinking HOT at VK. Nearly passed out from dehydration. The valley was chosen because of its natural pyramid appearance. The kings were buried within the valley in large tombs, and the usual tomb plan consisted of a long inclined rock-cut corridor, descending through one or more halls to the burial chamber. There are 63 reported tombs, with discoveries as late as 2008. We got to see 5 tombs including: tutankhamun (KV 62), Ramses II, Ramses V and VI.

The tombs were amazing, and so lavish - and this is without all the treasure and valuables. The Egyptians believed that an elaborate set of burial customs were necessary to ensure their immortality after death. These rituals and protocols included mummification, casting of magic spells, and burial with specific grave goods thought to be needed in the afterlife.

No camera policy was enforced at VK. I tried to sneak in a photo with the phone but got busted by the security guard. In usual dodgy - or perhaps the better word is capitalistic - fashion, the guard signalled for money so I paid him off with 20 egyptian pounds (approx $4 AUD). Modern Egyptians are money hungry, kinda understandable when the average wage is something like 2 Egyptian pounds per day.

It was a long hot morning under the sun. We returned to the Melodie tired and crisp. My afternoon nanna nap turned into a deep sleep and I missed the pirates!

We have also discovered the art of scarf folding! Very useful.

YDG and Eric also gave me a surprise ring with hieroglyphics engravings. I like and very cool!

Journey to Luxor

2009-09-16T06:25:00.001+10:00

We spent the night experiencing inertia driven tossing and turning on the sleeper train ride from Cairo to Luxor. In fact, if you were lucky enough to get a bottom bunk (no protective guard) and facing the same direction as the train, the chances of falling off the bed in the middle of the night are very good.

It was a rocky ride and having to walk down a longish corridor for a loo visit while getting thrown from side-to-side was quite a physical challenge.

We arrived in Luxor at around 6.30am and boarded the M/S Melodie. Trying to guess our boat from the fleet of boats/cruise ships lined up along the cornish was quite exciting. Ours turned out to be the smallest, but the interior is newly refurbished and just scrapes past Eric's standards. Funny thing is that we have to walk through 4 other cruise ships to get to our ship. The Melodie will be our home for the next 3 nights.

Our horse carriage journey to Karnak Temple was marred by cross ghetto horse carriage vendor fighting/stalement. The south-side horse carriage vendors showed their disapproval when we all hopped into horse drawn carriages owned by the north-side. Not sure what the street rules are but the south-side gang attempted to block our route and thwart our journey. Shouting and a bit of rif raf ensued. Good tourist entertainment for the rest of us.

Karnak Temple is estimated to be as old 4000 BC. Karnak is the site of ruined temples, chapels, pylons, statues etc amassed over 2000 years by various pharaohs, including Tutankhamun's father. It really is a site to be marvelled at. Such history and grandeur. Those ancient Egyptians sure knew how to make their mark. Our 'Egyptologist' guide was a bit of a mad wise man who claims he gave Gough Whitlam a tour around Karnak. He demanded your undivided attention and came down hard on silly tourists who thought it would be appropriate to climb on to the statues. I wish he came down on those silly pubescent tourists who thought it would be appropriate to dress in mini skirts and tiny tank tops. Ugh, it was so extremely inappropriate and wrong.

The afternoon/evening was mostly spent at the local bazaar. We spent 1 hour in literally the first shop at the bazaar. There is still a whole strip of shops to explore

We have a 5am wake up call tomorrow so better hit the sack.

Cairo

2009-09-15T02:38:00.002+10:00

It has been a long day. We unnecessarily woke up one hour earlier than required (4.45am), thanks to misleading information courtesy of Emirates Airlines. I don't know why we all naturally assumed that the clocks on our typical Egyptian quality rooms (i.e. budget motel style) were wrong.

We were treated to yet another buffet breakfast - the count is now 4 boo-fays in 3 days. The falafels were delish. After a bit of prepping from Fran our tour guide (don't drink tap water, you will get hassled etc), we navigated through the crazy the maniac traffic then without much warning, BLAM! There they were: the Pyramids of Egypt. The sight was quite amazing - the sheer size and sophistication of the Pyramids and Sphinx was/is amazing. We also climbed inside the Great Pyramid of Giza (also called the Pyramid of Khufu and Pyramid of Cheops) for a glimpse of the burial chamber. Not one for the claustrophobics.

About to head off to our sleeper train which will bring us to Luxor.

Dubai, aka Do-Buy

2009-09-14T13:31:00.001+10:00

We had an important event to wake up for this morning.

Buffet breakfast.

Unbelievably, this morning's buffet was our THIRD consecutive buffet since leaving Sydney yesterday! This means that all our meals so far have been all-you-can-eat boo-fays. This more than makes up for the kilos that we have lost through dehydration. Thank God for air-conditioning.

Speaking of religion, Ramadan has been quite an interesting experience. There is to be no eating, drinking and public affection during the holy month and as a sign of respect, tourists should equally refrain from partaking in any of the above. As you would expect, the liquid restriction was rather tough particularly when you're roaming around in a desert. Water never tasted so good I tell you.

Dubai is essentially a crazy sim-desert city prospering off the back of oil discovery in 1966. This is a city where you can get gas at about 30 AU cents per litre (compared to water at $1+ per litre). Looking at Dubai, you begin to understand the significance of oil, and why the U.S were so keen to "help" Iraq.

The oil money that has poured into Dubai has translated into some of the craziest ideas, e.g.:

* an underwater hotel.
* a building that has levels that rotate in sync with the clock. This means that you will go to sleep facing say north and wake up facing, say west.
* a indoor ski field annexed to a shopping centre. There are plans to build the world's largest ski domes.
* a residential village which sits on top of a lagoon (of course, the lagoon will be man-made).
* a self contained village called "the world" which will look like a map of the world. Rod Stewart has already acquired the U.K for $20m.
* a jurassic style park.

Then of course, there is the perverse goal to have the 'best' of everything:
* biggest airport
* tallest building (sways 5m at the very top)
* biggest Disneyland
* biggest sports city
* biggest shopping centre
* fastest metro
* fastest elevator

You have to wonder whether this all comes a price. Dubai is a city built in a desert. It was never a city blessed with natural resources so consider the intense energy and water consumption. It is not surprising that Dubai owns the dubious honour of the most water consumption per capita.

Our big bus tour guide (we had to chase down the big bus in a taxi!) mentioned that the oil will run out in 2010. Not sure if that's true but Dubai has certainly milked it for all it is worth. The gaudy show of wealth and unnecessary excesses is not for me but it is amazing that they managed to cultivate barren desert land.

In Cairo now. The apple sheesha was yum but it wasn't a great start when the toilet decided not to work and leak dirty toilet water into the bathroom. We also managed to get the time wrong - stupid Emirates told us the wrong time. BUT we do get to see the pyramids and the Egyptian museum today.

Dubai - First Impressions

2009-09-12T15:33:00.001+10:00

First impression of Dubai: HOT. We touched down at around about 5.20am and it was already hitting 30+ degrees Celsius.

We are now keeping ourselves chilled (this is probably the right context to use the word 'chillax' but it is such an awful word) in our 5 star Crown Plaza room before we brave the humidity at 10am - when all the shops open.

Dubai is spacious ... and rather barren. There is a lot of construction leaving the city feeling slightly primitive, but yet futuristic.

A big day ahead. Feels like we have been awake forever. Suspension of time is not so bad on your birthday.

Dubai

2009-09-12T11:52:00.001+10:00

Just disembarked our A380 and now in Dubai International airport. It feels like a Vegas casino with its palm trees and bright lights.

In Love with Emirates

2009-09-11T21:10:00.001+10:00

So many movies, we estimate over 300. And there is 30 Rock. Am super SUPER impressed. No need for iPod, DS or book

I can have my holiday on this plane!

Off to a good (customer service) start

2009-09-11T20:47:00.001+10:00

A choice of mags and newspapers.

Jetstar this aint.

Enroute to Bday Extravaganza

2009-09-11T20:35:00.002+10:00

First stop, Dubai.

Have never flown Emirates so this will be a treat or should I say bazaar.

Hubby Hubby

2009-09-02T16:35:00.003+10:00

Ben and Jerry (coming to Australia in October 2009 according to their website) have renamed their popular flavour "chubby hubby" to "hubby hubby" in recognition of the legalisation of same-sex marriage in Vermont. Vermont is the 1st U.S state to legalise same-sex marriage through legislature as opposed to judicial ruling/case law - go small G government!

Ben and Jerry's renaming flavour choice is perplexing. Why would you rename it to a word that means married man when the whole point of the exercise is to celebrate gender neutrality? The even more curious thing is that they have so many other flavour to choose from - what about:

Imagine Whirled Peace to Imagine Queer Peace
Everything But The becomes Everything Including The
Chocolate Therapy could be Same Sex Therapy

Or have I missed the point?

Middle East - A Primer

2009-08-28T18:08:00.004+10:00

Tickets are booked.
Luggage, via redeemed Rewards Points is on its way.
Won money on the cleopatra pokies last night (sure sign if ever there was one).
Pyramid schemes was a topic of (unprompted) conversation last night (another tell tale sign).

Destination: Egypt and Jordan
Date of departure: before my birthday! yay!

Innov-8

2009-08-27T00:05:00.002+10:00

I had a bright spark of ingenuity at work, using only magnetic letters and a colleague's work shelf.

A bit of late night free-to-air viewing tonight, courtesy of Channel 10. Caught the end of Sports Tonight, now without the rhyming flow of Matthew White; and Dave Letterman is currently delivering his dialogue in the background.

The way Brad McEwan over-emphasised the words "three times' when reporting about newly crowned 800m world champion Caster Semenya's testosterone levels was annoying. Imagine if someone was to add annoying inflections whenever you do something in excess e.g. you talk THREE TIMES more than the average person; you use THREE TIMES the average toilet roll sheets. It is unnecessary.

David Letterman's pants sit quite high on his waist. Part of the funny clown act perhaps.

Ouch Pouch

2009-08-18T14:34:00.004+10:00

Apropos of last week's post, and in line with the ever present 'channelling of positive energy' thanks to a certain doctor's new found vocation in the beauty industry ...

Hey Wayne, why not suffer in style, using the ouch pouch

I like the 'days left' touch ...

Mish* Mash*

2009-08-13T17:32:00.001+10:00

Mish-ap, Mish-andle

First up, the annual Miss Universe pageant blurb. The glorious spectacle is back on, this time in the Bahamas (or should it be "at the Bahamas". I'm bad with prepositions and happy to be corrected).

This year, the nod goes to Miss Japan aka Emiri Miyasaka and her national costume, or rather the lack thereof. The term 'national costume' has always been subject to liberal interpretations. For example, this year's Miss Ireland sashayed across the room in an Irish outfit consisting of a bikini and stiletto heels. The artistic touch was in the leprechaun hat which was nicely accessorised with the symbol of Ireland - the shamrock. Deep. In fact, she could have re-used her national costume in the swimsuit competition, but she would have to lose the pièce de résistance - the shamrock hat.

Miss Japan 2009's imagination was not to be outdone by Miss Ireland - have a look at this rocking outfit:

Apart from the obvious connection between the kimono and the land of the rising sun, I'm not sure that I see the relevance of pink stockings, pink panties, a garter belt and a come-hither, open-wide designed kimono. They could have at least made the stockings/panties polka dot red/white.

Mash, Mash-ed, Mash-ed Up

Plenty of mashed-up limbs and weary bodies after a impulsive day trip to Thredbo on Monday. Worse for the wear was Wayne who dislocated his wrist and duly ripped the ligament in his wrist after this attempt:

More mashed-up, unsightly fat bruised fingers after our basketball semi finals win (by a mere point). I suspect that my co-ordination is starting to decrease exponentially as I sail into the decade that shall not be mentioned.

Mish Mash

With all this pontification and lack of action on climate change, we might have to take actions in our own hands. Two brilliant ideas for your consideration - the first relatively is easy, the second requires a bit more forethought.
1. Peeing in the shower - saves on toilet paper too (Brazilian initiative)
2. Recycling metal parts salvaged from the dead, and/or recycling crematorium heat (Danish initiative).

64th Anniversary of Hiroshima Bombing

2009-08-06T20:16:00.000+10:00

At 8:15am this day, 46 years ago, Enola Gay dropped "Little Boy" (a uranium bomb) on to the city of Hiroshima. 6th August was chosen because clouds had previously obscured the target. The target was chosen for military reasons and for its terrain. The Target Committee rated Hiroshima as an 'AA Target'. The Committee's clinical research into the suitability of Hiroshima as an atomic bomb target is summed up in the following paragraph (quoted from the minutes):

"This is an important army depot and port of embarkation in the middle of an urban industrial area. It is a good radar target and it is such a size that a large part of the city could be extensively damaged. There are adjacent hills which are likely to produce a focussing effect which would considerably increase the blast damage."

Boston.Com's The Big Picture has a good visual time line of the Hiroshima bombing.

I was in Hiroshima in February 2008. Something about the place and its plight really resonated in my psyche. The Hiroshima Peace Memorial Museum was really very good.

The Digital World Kills Cultural Snobbery or Keen Connoisseurship

2009-07-14T17:16:00.004+10:00

Wonderfully written article about the digitisation of mass media, and how this has affected our sense of self and inhibited our ability distinguish ourselves from others.

And here I was contemplating an embargo on books since purchased books just end up collecting dust and occupying precious space. 5 days of reading pleasure for years and years of storage/dust pain. That equates to a very small marginal utility
.

BUT ...

Alas, not only do books "furnish a room, to paraphrase the title of an Anthony Powell novel, but also accessorize our outfits. They help brand our identities. At the rate technology is progressing, however, we may eventually be traipsing around culturally nude in an urban rain forest, androids seamlessly integrated".

My embargo may actually lead to a human apocalypse a la Terminator!

The last paragraph is defining ...
"As all this space opens up—as the tokens of our cultural snobbery or keen connoisseurship (take your pick, depending on the degree of pretentious wankery you attribute to others) recede into the hideaway shelves and flash drives—what will refill it? “After two decades of defining ourselves in terms of our possessions,” Holly Brubach wrote recently in T: The New York Times Style Magazine, “we now need to figure out who we would be without them.” I suspect that once this downturn plateaus and shrinks in the rearview mirror, we’ll just stock up on other possessions, which will be arrayed and arranged to show off not our personal aesthetics or expensive whims but our ethics—our progressive virtues. A place where we could play host to Barack and Michelle and feel assured they’d find nothing amiss."

Lucky I already have Barack Obama's autobiography.

Flavour of Asia

2009-06-12T17:55:00.001+10:00

It was disappointing times for the Asian race this morning. 3 oriental culprits all displaying very poor judgement when it comes to train etiquette.

Asian 1 (A1) - Guilty of unacceptable noise pollution when speaking extremely loudly into his mobile phone. Noise pollution intensified when the battery on his mobile phone started fading, which led to A1 adopting the strategy of yelling into his handset, as if the handset was a voice-powered piece of equipment. Quarter way through the journey, the entire carriage knew all about his dirty little secret - he owed the guy on the other end of the phone $5000.

Asian 2 (A2) - Guilty of blaring music emitting from his headphones. Nobody wants to hear TI or similar rubbish that early in the morning.

Asian 3 (A3) - Guilty of playing a keyboard intensive game with the keypad tone at max level. Unbelievably annoying, especially since A3 was sitting beside me.

For all the deficiencies in train etiquette, we certainly make it up in other areas e.g. Asian Poses - must click on website, it is hilarious. I think I was born for the "Puffy Cheeks" pose. It requires no additional effort on my part so I think might give it a go in my next photo opportunity. The website recommends puffy cheeks in addition to other violent poses like "bang or claws, since it adds to the ferocity of the pose". Such ingenuity!

My other favourite is pose #24, otherwise know as the "Nyan Nyan" pose, which is meant to simulate the noise a cat makes. I do like the option of wearing "cat ears and a collar with a bell on it, if you want to make sure no one misinterprets this pose."

Other practical suggestions/warnings include:

for the Bang pose - to put both hands together to form a thicker gun.
for the Louder pose - voice amplification is simulated by putting the hands at an angle with palm facing outwards. Although it is debatable whether you will get louder, you will surely get people’s attention with this cute pose
for the Claws pose - if done right, people will be silenced by the absolute cuteness of this gesture.
for the Shush pose - optionally, one can make a “shhh” noise with their lips to add to the realism.

Intriguing Photos

2009-05-27T18:16:00.000+10:00

WSJ filed this one under "sports snapshots"

Look at the grimace on their faces - yeouch. I think high heel boots are the way to go if have aspirations to win a high-heel sprint. Might be worth it for the $6,225 prize money.

And imagine a 2 year, fully funded worldwide photography assignment; terms and conditions to be determined by your own creativity. Meet Richard Mosse and his body of work, Breach. Breach captures images of the U.S military occupying (or making themselves comfortable) in palaces that belonged to Saddam Hussein, and they had a lot to choose from seeing as there were 81 in total (yes 81?!?!!). Mosse was keen to develop the idea of accidental monument through these photos. My fave photo is this one below, and this interview with Mosse is an excellent read.

Ransom on Toady

2009-05-11T19:54:00.001+10:00

I want to be grow into a bigger Mari(o)ssa.

To this end, I have kidnapped Toady and am threatening to rip his China made stuffing into shreds with a nail file annexed to a nail cutter.

This is my ransom note.

Pay up or else there will be no room for his mush (heh).

Sent via BlackBerry® from Telstra

Lucky my name is not Ivy

2009-05-07T16:57:00.001+10:00

... because according to No.3 on Milton Glaser's (of 'I ❤ New York' fame) list of things he has learned, that may make Poison Ivy. Let me go find a plant and hug it.

Here is the 'infallible' test, according to Milton, to determine whether you are toxic or nourishing:

" ... observe whether you are more energised or less energised. Whether you are tired or whether you are exhilarated. If you are more tired then you have been poisoned. If you have more energy you have been nourished."

If golf was a person, it would definitely be as toxic *cue Britney Spears*

So let's stick with this toxic theme. This swine flu maybe/maybe not pandemic reminds me of this Tracey Ullman State of the Union skit. While the word "medieval" has yet to surface on news reports/broadcasts etc, the sensationalisation of the event has been pretty full-on. The facts are: 300 confirmed swine flu cases; 12 deaths due to the virus and as indicated by the Freakonomics link, the problem could have been contained but for poverty and lack of access to proper medical facilities. The media has such an enormous influence on day-to-day lives. No wonder people are taking this piggy cold seriously - bad time to get married in Mexico.

On other toxic related news, I'm back on the little blue pills. It is seriously giving me scatter brain. I feel unable to function in swine-flu ridden society.

Somewhere Over the Rainbow ...

2009-05-01T17:26:00.004+10:00

My week has been a utter FAIL! So here are some non-gloomy pictures to make amends.

And better make mention of #swine flu just to get in on the google statistics.

Tooting your own horn

2009-04-22T19:44:00.001+10:00

The announcement that came through the loud speakers on this morning's shittyrail service:

"Good morning ladies and gentleman, welcome to Cityrail - Sydney's number one rail network"

Number one or only one?

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Bubye Barnbougle

2009-04-14T17:37:00.001+10:00

Until next time ...

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Slice of Heaven with a bit of Hells Gate

2009-04-14T01:09:00.003+10:00

I would love to retire in Tasmania where everyday is a happy day, and the air that you inhale is as fresh as the canned Perri-Air in Spaceballs. Where your surroundings are always picture perfect and where you can get Boags Draught on tap.

Today we made our journey to the mecca of golf - Barnbougle - but not before stopping off at a Strawberry Farm and Daniel Alps at Strathlynn, Rosevears. The troops were hard at work picking non-mongoloid strawberries at the Hillwood Strawberry Farm. Sweet, juicy, cheap and free of pesticides, meaning we could do what Maccas kids cannot - eat on the job.

The lunch stop, Daniel Alps, was an hour filled with delectables. Duck, pork belly, french cheese, warm choc filled pudding accompanied by wine & coffee. Definitely worth a visit if you are in the area.

Then it was onwards to Barbougle, aka Hells Gate for its narrow fairways caressed with the dreaded button grass along the edges. This afternoon's session was a warm-up for the "competition" which begins tomorrow. Boys vs Girls. Hipe the boys choke like Greg Norman.

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Sunrises and Sunsets

2009-04-13T08:54:00.004+10:00

We are seriously being spoilt with gorgeous views every day. It's nearly unfair.

World Heritage Cruise

2009-04-12T23:38:00.001+10:00

We boarded the catamaran - the Eagle - which took us on a journey on the Macquarie Harbour and the World Heritage listed Gordon Wilderness Area.

Along the way, we saw aquaculture pens brimming with Atlantic Salmon, and the former penal colony on Sarah Island, once regarded as hell on earth by convicts. The cruise also involved a stroll at the ancient forests at Heritage Landing where we marvelled at 2000 year old Huon Pine trees.

Did you know that to make it on the World Heritage list, you need to satisfy one out of the ten listed criteria. The Gordon River Wilderness Area meets SEVEN making it the highest rated World Heritage Area on Earth. The Gordon River is also famous for its mirror perfect reflections.

Strahan has seen quite a bit over the years: indigenous people, convicts, miners and piners, immigrant workers on the hydroelectric schemes, and now tourists.

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Strahan - and our awesome pad

2009-04-11T21:37:00.002+10:00

Strahan (pronounced Strawn), declared the best little town by the Chicago Tribune (need to find the source), and famous for its trout. Suffice to say that it is a gorgeous little town; perfectly picturesque by the tannin concentrate seaside.

Our pad is right next to the water, and the view is absolutely breathtaking. It is really quite spectacular.

We will be doing the Strahan cruise tomorrow - buffet included of course.

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Montezuma Falls

2009-04-11T18:21:00.001+10:00

Beautiful, stunning and too much power walking.

Scary leech talks also led to "Your mama is such leech" show-down. Best of the day was: "your mama is such a leech that her blood type turned AB"

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Sheffield - The Town of Murals

2009-04-11T10:06:00.002+10:00

After a delectable and now slightly sickening chocolate gorge fest at the Anvers Chocolate Factory, we find ourselves in Sheffield - the town of Murals.

Very quaint and charming.

Even has a marble shop. Cat eyes!

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Feel ...

2009-04-10T20:29:00.001+10:00

... the spirit down below

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Boarding the Spirit of Tasmania

2009-04-10T19:38:00.002+10:00

First time on a cruise ship.

I can feel sea sickness coming on.

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Stats so far

2009-04-10T16:01:00.002+10:00

We just passed Goulburn, Victoria.

Some statistics:

- number of L platers on the road so far: 13

- kilometres covered: 666

- average speed: 105.8 kms/hr

- number of stops: 3

- number of fast food stops included in stops: 2 (one McDonald's; one Hungry Jacks)

- number of scary storms: 1

- number of carcasses: 7

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Gundagai - For Real Song

2009-04-10T11:42:00.001+10:00

I shall never doubt really bad mumbler of tunes ever again.

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On the Road to Gundagai

2009-04-10T11:12:00.001+10:00

We are 'on the road to Gundagai', which I am told is a for real song. Can't say that the tune that my driver is mumbling resembles a tune. I will have to accept it at face value.

We are en route to Tasmania, with a brief stop in Melbourne where we will board the Spirit of Tasmania.

The on board computer says that we have travelled 282kms; and I need to pee.

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Rate Away

2009-04-09T15:18:00.004+10:00

Please rate my photo (well) - click here

Driving to Tasmania tomorrow.

Apropos

2009-04-02T17:56:00.004+11:00

Poor Dayana Mendoza - winner of 2008 Miss Universe pageant - and now officially a place getter on the "10 stories that could be April Fools ... but aren't" list (see No. 8). Is this fall from grace worse than literal falls from graces by Miss USA 2007 and Miss USA 2008? Dangerous sport this pageant gig.

On her blog, Dayana tells us that Guantanamo Bay is "a relaxing place, so calm and beautiful". Perhaps the Venezuelan should put as much research/pre-preparation into her blog entries as she did with her 'Final Question' segment; and I must admit, her winning answer in the 2007 pageant was rather innovative. For interest, see pictures and report.

Wiki reports that president Hugo Chavez is reconsidering the praise he had previously given her. Will we hear a "you're fired" from Donald Trump?

Topsy Turvy, like Billy Blanks' Abs

2009-04-01T15:39:00.004+11:00

What a topsy turvy March it was. Oddly, it has all culminated into a bit of fizzle; an asystolic pause. Calm before the storm, or inevitable winding down a la the VHS tape? Oh I do feel for the forgotten, obselete VHS tape. But here's a scoop: over the weekend, I found a VHS tape with Tae Bo on it - sweet!

How could we resist the temptation of a work out with Billy Blanks and those super hardcore android-accompaniments. That poor Shelly, always made to count, while holding an imaginary cup on her hips, knees and ankles during the taekwondo kicks . My imaginary cup was plastic and disposable - less effort to hold up. It must have been a completely ridiculous sight; and we didn't even make it through the whole session. Taut abs, gluteus maximus' go begging.

March 2009 involved:

dogmatic searches for 'signs';
attempts at usurping fate via 20 cent coin tosses, which incidentally lands on heads 80% of the time;
numerous poll-taking exercises with unsuspecting and kind volunteers/victims
a few attempts at penning a predictive mathematical formula;
some productive and unproductive discussions;
last ditch, when all else fails tactics i.e. desperately seeking Dr Phil and Oprah.

Now we are on the other side, probably too fresh (and exhausted) to reflect in any meaningful manner. Regret or Reborn?

March 2009 made sane with the help of:

The movie: Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist - it has The Cure, an excellent soundtrack and 'geek du jour' Michael Cera - what else do you need?
The book: Disgrace - how well does this guy write. Jealous.
The fact: 79% chance that I will still be working when I am 37.
Miraculous return of form of our basketball team with the help of Shaq Attack.
Bragging rights for being equal winner at the Terry Hills driving range challenge.
Good friends & family.

Horror Terror Horror Terror Nightmare Horror Fear

2009-03-23T20:08:00.000+11:00

I didn't realise Tracey Ullman is back on TV (well cable); and still in very fine form.

The title will make sense when you get to the last 20 seconds of the clip.

America is such a unique society of extreme oxymorons. Consider: President Bush; God fearing country with a propensity for war; democratic state that supports the PATRIOT Act; Las Vegas wedding; Jerry Springer the opera (though technically not American); American healthcare.

And one for Channel 9 Current Affairs tomorrow: no such thing as healthy fast food.

Ribs, Flash Storm and Coldplay

2009-03-15T03:50:00.006+11:00

A 1pm wake-up effort gave me just enough time to watch online horse racing **plug BigPond racing** and get ready for Coldplay.

My 2 horses both made me lose mon-neigh. I should really stay away from horse racing, at least until I find out what tote means. After some mild cussing at the LCD monitor, it was time for ribs and Coldplay.

The meal at ribs and rumps was ridiculously filling. I opted for a burger since I am not a big fan of ribs.

A freaky flash storm ripped through Homebush just as we left the restaurant for Acer Arena. We stopped off at a convenient store to buy an umbrella (ella ella). The $8 umbrella was no match for the raging wind and rain. Even the bulldogs fans we passed along the way were mild compared to the storm.

There were abandoned umbrellas and umbrella carnage along our treacherous route. There were also many women who wished they didn't wear white and black under garments tonight. Luckily the Sea Eagles and Bulldogs boys were preoccupied next door at ANZ Stadium. The sight may have led to all sorts of dubious behaviour. Although I doubt Coldplay fans have fathers with criminal records ... pathetic Channel 9 tactics by the way.

When we reached the gates, the security guard suggested that I use the ladies to dry myself - yup I was duh-renched.

Coldplay did not disappoint. The show was awesome. My only complaint is that they should have played a few more songs. My other complaint is 'sit down up the front!'

If you ever wonder about the proliferation of mobile phones, take a look at the last photo above.

I shall leave you with yellow ...

Re-Post: Happy Birthday & Engagement Chicken Queen

2009-03-12T02:03:00.004+11:00

Or should I say, Happy Birthday & Engagement (no more) Swimming Prawns, something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue.

Nobody had a clue.
UHU glue (stick)

Happy Birthday Chicken Queen

2009-03-11T18:25:00.003+11:00

Or should I say, Happy Birthday (no more) Swimming Prawns.

Wooden Spoon

2009-03-09T18:39:00.002+11:00

Last week, we made it to the play-offs for basketball ... for the Wooden Spoon.

How did this happen? How did we get to this level of incompetency? Could try and make it sound less ghastly but clarifying that it was the Wooden Spoon for Division 1 and our team is akin to a bunch of midgets (or whatever the PC term is these days) running around in a forest full of Eucalyptus regnans. Yes every now and then we get smashed (blocked) by one of these tall trees.

However the reality is that we did not win one single game during the entire competition.

This is foreign territory.

Perhaps we have turned into those mommas that we so callously undermined back in those youthful days when tall trees weren't so much of an obstacle.

Oh the retribution ...

Cars ... cars ... cars ... on runways

2009-03-02T14:54:00.005+11:00

Pictures of unsold cars below. Airport runways are the parking spot of choice. Make sense: no parking metres, Keanu Reeves used it in Speed 1, don't have to worry about gutters, prevents aviation transportation (doubly good for the environment).

Looks like the 2 for 1 deals aren't working.

Only One iPhone?

2009-03-01T22:21:00.005+11:00

The Wall Street Journal's Photo Journal is always a good source of photographic inspiration ... and humour.

The commentary to the below photo is as follows:
Environmental Protection Agency employees used their cellphone cameras to photograph first lady Michelle Obama as she addressed them in Washington Thursday

Just as long as they remember to recycle those cell phones

How many of those photos ended up on twitpic?

Oyster Omelette Orneriness

2009-02-26T01:46:00.003+11:00

Bad choices are a fact of life.

Even when logic and common sense all pointed towards staying away from 5-day old takeaway oyster omelette with chicken rice, something in my fat-head brain caved and ... hello sick day.

At the time, justifications for eating 5-day old oyster omelette included:

religion - belief (or rather delusion) that iron stomach can and will withstand all variants of e coli;
relationships - ultimate trust in man-made machines over nature e.g. freezing power of refrigerators, zapping power of microwaves;
love - love for chicken rice;
laziness - could not be bothered going downstairs to buy bacteria-free lunch.

Wonder how long it will be before I can eat oysters again. Finding bits of oyster stuck in teeth 7 hours after eating the darn things does not help with the rehabilitation process.

Oscars 2009 - Best Presenters

2009-02-23T23:44:00.011+11:00

I'm probably more than slightly biased when it comes to anything 30 Rock/Tina Fey, but the comedic talents of the two SNL alumni comes through quite clearly in their presentation of 'best screenplay' at this year's Oscars.

Pain,Pain Go Away ...

2009-02-23T19:43:00.008+11:00

... come again NEVER.

There is still the outstanding question as as to whether I am in fact soft or super hardcore.

Before I give you the answer to what is seemingly an obvious question with an obvious answer, let me just say that:

a) I'm still in a lot of pain
b) I woke up on the weekend with my arm stuck in the air (dunno what I was celebrating). It felt very freakish and took a bit of effort (and a lot of pain) to pry the deviant locked arm back to the mother ship.
c) I'm still in a lot of pain.
d) pain, pain, pain, pain, pain - my middle name should be Payne.

The x-rays suggest that there is no fracture, but rather bone and tendon bruising. After hearing scary and social sports-limiting stories about misdiagnoses and low-quality x-rays, I am now contemplating seeing a shoulder specialist. With April long weekend holidays coming up (minus the Anzac holiday which has mysteriously disappeared into the ether) I want the shoulder to be in a state healthy enough to swing a golf club.

Although this might be good excuse not to play golf ... but how can you go pass Barnbougle after the last experience. Not to mention the scallop & curry pies.

Hypotheticals ...

2009-02-21T02:55:00.003+11:00

Hypotheticals ...

the subject matter of table conversations of late, prompted by Gregan's random request to come up with a few good hypothetical questions. My pitiful attempts included:

"Marry, boff, kill" hypothetical - i.e. pick 3 names and then assign a name to each.
If you had to choose a friend to eat, who would it be and which part would you Cannibal Lector first.
Which one would you pick to watch out of: ping pong show in Thailand or sex show in Amsterdam.

Hard hitting as you can see.

I'm not certain that the answers that we give to a hypothetical situation, devoid of context, circumstance etc. necessarily reflects what we would actually do.

For example, in the documentary Steal a Pencil For Me (my Thursday night nigel viewing) - a documentary about a forbidden love affair in a Nazi concentration camp - the protagonist Jack Polak was begged by his sister and his good friend on several occasions to spare the bread that Jack had been safe-keeping. Jack's sister was dying. Jack's good friend's son was also dying. The bread was their ticket to survival. The small piece of bread may/may not have saved one or any of them.

Jack said no to his sister. His sister ends up dying.
Jack said no to his friend. His friend and his friend's son are Holocaust survivors.

In the documentary, Jack recounts this story with deep anguish, guilt and tears. You can't help but grieve with/for him. What an excruciating position to be in - not just his bread dilemma but the entire Jewish ordeal in WW2. The 'Final Solution' was so heinous, so inconceiveable, so heartbreaking, so morally deflating, so tragic.

Approximately 6 million Jews died in the Holocaust. That is still 800,000 more than the entire population of Victoria.

Jack and his forbidden lover Ina Soep were transported to a transit concentration (rather than a death) camp called Westerbork. Anne Frank was also at Westerbork before she was transported to Auschwitz. Every Tuesday for 2 years, a cargo train of 1,000 Jews left Westerbork bound for the death camps Auschwitz-Birkenau, Sobibór, Bergen-Belsen and Theresienstadt. Jack would help with loading fellow Jews on the train. He loaded his own parents on the train.

95% of the people that pass through Westerbork died.

Maybe I will watch a less traumatic doco next Thursday. Although there is actually an uplifting and heartwarming pulse that runs through Steal a Pencil For Me. You see, sometimes love does conquer all ...

Schwarzenegger Super Cows

2009-02-18T17:16:00.002+11:00

Documentaries are my idiot-box viewing of choice these days. Most recently, I watched (twice in one day) a doco about steroids: Bigger, Stronger, Faster*. Highly recommended if only to marvel at Schwarzenegger Super Cow (aka Belgian Blue cattle):

Blessed with double muscle via the operation of a mutated gene that suppresses the operation of Myostatin, the Schwarzenegger Super Cow makes its twitchy appearance mid-way through the doco. Not entirely sure about the relevance of the 'monster cow'. I suspect it may have been to illustrate the effects of steroids over-dosing, hence the term Schwarzenegger Super Cow.

I'm kinda a bit over all these super rich sports stars using the 'young and stupid' excuse to justify their stupidity, including A.Rod's not-so-shocking admission about his steroids abuse in 2001-2003.

A.Rod was born in 1975. He would have been 26-28 during the Schwarzenegger Super Cow years. It's a bit far fetched to say that 26-28 is young. Stupid: yes. Greedy: yes. Weak: yes. Cheater: yes. This guy is getting paid $27.5 mil a year to be all these things.

And yes, I'm the pleb that feeds the machine since I own an A.Rod shirt - I feel so dirty. Actually I just haven't returned it to it's owner. I vow to either burn it, write "sux" next to A.Rod, change 'A.Rod' to 'MAR ode', or wear it only to bed.

G.H.A

2009-02-15T04:23:00.002+11:00

I have found 2 people that need to sign up to G.H.A - Guitar Hero Anonymous - post haste.

Step 1: no guitar hero activity after 4.30am.

Step 2: no repeated attempts at every song on 'expert' level.

Step 3: know when to cut your losses when you have failed @ 9% four times in a row.

Step 4: when you need alcohol to fuel GH performance, it is time to stop.

Step 5: when you need to resort to the customised songs (aka craphouse old school mobile polyphonic tunes) just because you have exhausted all the real songs, it is time to stop.

Step 6: when you feel like you need a cortisone shot to relieve the spasm in your fingers and arms, it is time to stop.

Step 7: when the host (me) is blogging about your GH-addiction, it is time to stop.

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Mona Lisa's X-Ray Hand

2009-02-13T13:18:00.003+11:00

What was meant to be a 20 minutes physio visit has taken a long, protracted detour (or in the language of the Amazing Race, I have been slapped with a "Yield" card).

Presently at a radiologist, evidently the same one Mona Lisa uses. The x-rays will hopefully show whether I have a fracture in in my left shoulder.

Should the potential fracture turn out to be an actual fracture, I will hereby announce my official hardcoreness and up the whinging/whining to make up for the lack of whinging/whining so far.

I will also have to make up a super hardcore story to go with the fracture.

If it turns out to be a lowly bruise, well I would be back where I have always been:

Soft.

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Forest Jihad? What the what?

2009-02-12T12:01:00.003+11:00

Fox News, renown for its conservative political advocacy, has been reported in the SMH with this to say about the Victorian bushfires:

"The Fox News service talked about "forest jihad", warning that terrorists would see the potential of using fires as a "highly effective weapon and simple tool of a holy war"."

What creative journalism. Certainly very appropriate coming from a broadcaster whose trademarks slogan is "Fair & Balanced".

Even Mr Men is getting in on the fun ...

Big Fish, Big Tank

2009-02-11T15:40:00.001+11:00

Inescapable re-introduction into the doldrums of non-holiday life has officially begun.
It hurts!
Sitting on your ass for 8 hours is surprisingly very tiring. A vending machine that spits out toasty drinks would go part way to addressing this lethargy.

Lethargy or not, gotta make sure I'm going with the general flow and swim, swim, swimmingly along:

The tank featured above is called the "Coast of Chile" and the marine life (excluding the great black shark) include: sardines, Japanese anchovy and Perjerrey.

Keynesian economics is making a big comeback as a result of all these government driven stimulus packages . John Maynard Keynes was my economist of choice during HSC days. Admittedly I only had a choice of 3 and freakonomics wasn't around in those days. Who would have though that Keynesian theory would be applied in my life time. Actually who would have thought any economics theory is applicable in the real world - that 'ceteris parabis' phrase always gets in the way.

The theory behind the stimulus package according to my basic 2 unit economics understanding is this:

Goverment pumps in dollars (e.g. investing in infrastructure, education etc) --> this leads to an increase in aggregate demand (total spending in the economy) --> initial injection of funds will also have a multiplier effect, i.e. even greater increase in output relative to the initial injection of funds --> overall increase in economic activity and reduction of unemployment and deflation.

Government spending (stimulus package) is particularly needed in times of weak economic activity because the components that make up total income (macro) - consumption and investment - are, by virtue of the recession non-existent. Moreover, prices and wages (natural market forces) are "sticky" and therefore will not restore the market to equilibrium.

Although there are certain goods and services that seem to 'swim' in a different direction, e.g.:
- Short hair cuts
- Soup
- Prostitutes (high end to be precise)
- Evangelical churches
- Cocoa
- Home vaults
- Taser Guns
- People who purchase luxury cars while I'm in Japan - you know who you are ...

Farewell Japan

2009-02-05T22:46:00.002+11:00

On packed Jet-frills flight.

Destination: Sydney.

Holidays always feel so short lived.

I have my hotel slippers, a chicken-o nigiri and Splash (the movie) which should just about get me through the next 8 hours.

Farewell splendid Japan.

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Osaka Fun

2009-02-05T01:17:00.006+11:00

Today's agenda consisted of:

Suntory Museum
Kaiyukan Aquarium

Suntory Museum was a mild disappointment - no Bill Murray, nor whiskey caskets. The building itself was quite impressive. As a precursor to the aquarium, we also treated ourselves to an IMAX movie - Deep Sea. Tell you what, 3D movies are hard-going on your eyes. Most of us managed to catch a few winks during the show.

The aquarium was very impressive. Interesting fact: the total quantity of glass in the aquarium outweighs the world's annual output by a factor of 1.5. The place was massive and the variety of marine life was extraordinary.

Tried my luck on a 200 yen anpanman machine. It must have been my lucky day because I scored the JACKPOT!

We also browsed around in Bic Camera and guess who I saw on TV...

Last Stop: Osaka

2009-02-04T02:17:00.012+11:00

We made a pit stop at Matsumoto Castle, in city of Matsumoto. The 600 yen entry fee convinced us to skimp on cultural enlightenment and eat some Mos Burger instead.

A few shinkansens later, we arrived in (rainy) Osaka.

We checked into Dotonbori Hotel, conveniently located in the middle of Namba and also near a restaurant called "the sex machine".

We then made a bee line to the all-you-can-eat sushi place we found last year. Food babies all around ... *belch*

Sayonara Shiga Kogen and Snow

2009-02-03T14:07:00.002+11:00

We begin our journey back to convict land via Osaka. We are currently on a bus (not a genki bus) that is gently meandering down the mountain towards Nagano Station.

We spent the day riding at another mountain - Yokoteyama - home of the 1998 Nagano Winter Olympics Alpine Course. Yokoteyama is situated on the other side of the main mountain but remains part of Shiga Kogen.

The landscape and scenary at Yokoteyama was breathtaking. It was almost as if someone splashed a gargantuan bucket of thick white paint and then froze time and physics at the point of impact. The trees looked like cauliflowers, and the buildings looked like replicas from Krypton (in the Christopher Reeves version of Superman and assuming that there are buildings on Krypton).

It was simply spectacular ... despite the malodorous chemical fumes (mixture of egg and fart) that radiated from the onsens. At first I thought it was our heavy breakfast (someone did eat THREE eggs that morning), but when it stuck around like a bad smell (heh), the blame quickly shifted to non-human causes.

Minutes away from Nagano Station now ...

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Random Photos - An Assortment

2009-02-02T00:15:00.001+11:00

We are totally doing the dodgy and watching the Federer vs. Nadal match online in the lobby of the hotel (internet only available in the lobby). Let's hope this place has no data cap ...

Some choice photos of Shiga Kogen below:

Some choice photos of the snow monkeys at Yamanouchi Town (at the bottom of the moutain) below. "Cleats" were optional shoe accessories. Good for traction, no good for white shoes or jeans (they created a Pro Heart effect on the back of jeans).

Ureshii Times

2009-02-01T23:26:00.002+11:00

It was ureshii times on the mountain today. What seemed like buckets of dry snow followed us around (at times aggressively) the entire day. To illustrate the point, there was enough volume and force behind the snowflakes to achieve the improbable: travel up my small nostrils. Bearing in mind my small Asian nostrils and the fact that I was wearing a face mask, the equation is as follows:
lodging of snow in nose = downpour

It was sch-weeeeeeet (not the nose bit).

Japan continues to serve up warm and gracious hospitality, courtesy of the many ladies that cook, clean, serve, cater for us. I have such affection for these ladies, and parting is that much harder when they are constantly smiling & bowing at you.

We have had very good dinners @ Shiga Kogen. Red Lantern ishaisakaya has been our local hangout on Night 2 and Night 4. Night 2 put a massive dent in the wallet (and number of brain cells). There was probably one too many sakes and shōchūs - no good when there is a shortage of water in the room.

Brekkie is served in the cafeteria in our hotel. The half poached egg with Japanese soy sauce is totemo oishii - just like how mom used to cool them but without the soy sauce and in a cute bowl.

Last day in Shiga Kogen tomorrow.

Photos of People in Lots of Snow

2009-02-01T11:39:00.007+11:00

Just to prove that I'm not fibbing about the buckets, photos of Dougie, Vicky and Glenn in the midst of a winter wonderland.

Heading out into the white abyss now ...

Japanese Marketing - a taste

2009-01-31T20:03:00.004+11:00

A casual browse in a Japanese convenient/souvenir/corner/random store always brings about golden photographic opportunities for interesting and/or quirky items - see above example (it is a loafer).

We paid a 500 yen voyeur fee yesterday to watch snow monkeys bath in sulphur stinking onsens. Animal attractions I think are a good reminder of the similarities between humans and animals, and the fact that we are actually not that far up the food chain.

And I don't know why these places always have squat only toilets - eek! From techy bidets to squat and possibly pee-your-pants/shoes toilets - this is a massive from grace.

Snow was about 90% epic today. Was bucketing down the entire day. The landscape of Shiga Kogen was completely different to what it was yesterday and the day before.

We soaked our weary limbs (and my bunged shoulder) in the in-house jacuzzi and onsen - so relaxing. Now we are chilling out in our room, with Asashis in hands and about to head out to dinner. As noted in Shar's guest blog, food places aren't easy to find around here. The customary practice is to hang out at your hotel, hence the abundance of hotels at Shiga Kogen.

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Buckets at Shiga Kogen

2009-01-31T10:17:00.003+11:00

I suspect today will be an awesome day on the snow. It is snowing buckets outside which is a welcomed change from the clear blue sky and rain (eek) we got yesterday.

The trees are all covered with white stuff and there are sporadic mini avalanches from the accumulation of snow on roof tops.

Let's hope the shoulder holds up today.

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Arriving in Shiga Kogen

2009-01-29T23:32:00.002+11:00

Hi everyone, this is Sharlene, guest-blogging on Marissa's blog from her blackberry! Very techy of me!

We spent today travelling from Hakuba to Shiga Kogen via 2 bus routes. There are a lot of aussies around which can be a bad thing, especially when they're being rude to the locals. We had an incident on the bus (which was packed) from Hakuba where an aussie mom was telling off a japanese local for minding a seat for her partner who was loading the luggage outside. Granted she had kids, but there are kinder ways to go about it than being high and mighty, also in the end there were enough seats for everyone.

After all that drama, we arrived at Shiga Kogen (after thrashing Marissa in Tetris DS, but have to admit she was kicking my ass on the first bus leg) and staying at the Sunroute Hotel. After dumping our stuff, we took a walk around town, and it is very traditional i.e dead quiet! A lot of school kids skiing, but all the shops were closed! No fresh snow, very sunny and nothing much else to do but eat. Depending on the conditions tomorrow, we will visit the snow monkeys (who have their own onsen) instead of snowboarding, so that should be interesting and fun!

One last thing about this place, apparently, there are two snow areas where it's skiers ONLY (YDG will love that). It's not an area that is extremely open to snowboarders, apparently the mountains are suited to skiers, so we shall see when we get on the slopes! Big dump happening in the next couple days, can't wait!

Okay enough story telling, it wasn't a very interesting day so had to blab about nothing! Oh yeah, no internet in the room, have to go to the lobby to connect! So, Gregan, please be patient with the games :)

Signing off!

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Total Axe on Fun Box

2009-01-28T00:39:00.005+11:00

We had a 30% epic day today.

50% epic according to Shar
40% epic according to Dougie
70% according to Vicky
NFI according to Glenn

Today, we ventured to the 3 in 1 mountain, consisting of Goryu, Happo One, Imori.

On the very last fun park run on Imori, Vicky axed herself on the funbox (unfortunately no live footage). The injury/gash was so impressive, we had to visit the patrol and the medical clinic.

The other highlight of the day is Sharlene's an*us split on the C-Box, also on the very last run of the day. Click play below.

Last day of riding in Hakuba tomorrow.

Do The Taco

2009-01-26T19:02:00.002+11:00

I did a taco on a sea rail at Iwakake.

The definition of a taco according to Dougie:
"A taco shell hanging on a clothes line".

Since Dougie's helmet cam died after 15 minutes, here are some first hand written eye witness reports:

Shar
Her taco was so great, I fell off the box in a state of hysteria.

Dougie
I thought you fell in love with the snow because you were kissing it.

Glenn
I was concerned for a fleeting moment, but that passed.

Vicky
in absentia

Some pictures - I wasn't getting much air today.

And Hakuba, famous for the biggest crap(e)

Zenkō-ji Temple

2009-01-26T02:55:00.002+11:00

Lost property status:

one right glove (Marissa) - left behind on bus
one pair of spectacles (Glenn)- left behind at relaxation oasis. Looks like somebody was so relaxed that he left his eyes behind.

Our gear was still in transit from Osaka airport so we spent the day sight-seeing in the city of Nagano. The itinerary was limited to one today - Zenkō-ji Temple.

The bus ride from our Chalet (view from our Chalet below) to Nagano is about an hour long.

According to the information pamphlet, the Japanese people have been told to visit the Zenjoki Temple at least once in their lifetime.

The temple is overseen by the Rokujizō. According to wiki, the Rokujizō are statues of the six Bodhisattvas, who gave up Buddhist enlightenment, in order to provide salvation to others. The Bodhisattvas are said to be able to commune with the six realms of hell, starvation, beasts, carnage, human beings and divine beings.

Pilgrims and visitors should also purify his/her body with the smoke from the incense burner in front of the Zenkō-ji. Rubbing the incense smoke on your body will bring you good health and fortune. We were originally under the mistaken belief that the head was supposed to be bathed in the incense smoke ... to bring heightened intelligence, hence the photos.

Joke is on us really, because at the end of the day, what are we but monkeys.

Sushi Train for Chinese New Year Dinner

2009-01-25T22:03:00.001+11:00

Dinner tonight will be sushi train.

Bummer about the crappy exchange rate; Dougie can't go hardcore with his sushi gorging this year.

shiawasena chuogokuno atarashi nen

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Interesting Experiences ... Day 1

2009-01-25T04:46:00.003+11:00

More about the interesting start.

Certainly has not been the usual Japanese experiences with the exception of:

rail system confusion, resulting in yet another wasted ticket. Our 'track' record on dud train tickets over the period of 4 years remains unblemished.

rail etiquette community education posters - cityrail should take note.

Lost in translation product descriptions - this is mean to say secret "pouch".

anpanman mania - anpanman playground was spotted on top of a random building Izumisano. Bad anpanman impersonations were also spotted in a random restaurant in Hakuaba.

First time experiences include:

15 mins for 5000 yen (correction: 500 yen) shower at airport lounge. Just think portable loos but way cleaner and far more techy. And unlike your normal portable loo strategy, the aim was to maximise time and welfare. Somehow we all could only manage to consume 5 out of the allocated 15 minutes despite our very best efforts to prolong the experience.

9 hours for 1900 yen relaxation oasis. Just think 24 hour internet cafe, but with extra comfort facilities, including massage chairs, your own little oasis to sleep in, shelves full of risque comic books and unlimited drinks machine.

6 trains, and 8 hours later, we have arrived at white horse, aka as Hakuba.

Hopefully the snow will come out to play over the next few days.

En Route to Nagano

2009-01-24T18:32:00.001+11:00

On our way to Nagano via shinkanzen. It has been an interesting start. More about that later (if I get online).

A few more train rides ahead. Haven't slept in a bona fide bed for nearly 48 hours. I suspect the lack of mattress has been the driver behind my bizarre e.g. Joaquin Phoenix.

No dreams about toilets however, which incidentally is the subject matter of my recurring dreams. Could be because toilets are so user friendly in Japan. The only really hard decision is to choose between Big Flush, or Little Flush, or traditional (non-button activated) flush.

I chose traditional flush because I don't like to judge the size and character of my excrements.

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Day of Departure - Japan Bound

2009-01-23T08:15:00.002+11:00

Too early to construct proper, grammatically correct sentences.

Woke up at ungodly hour to arrive at airport @ 6am.

Scored the boobie prize jackpot when we were greeted by a trainee Jet-frills 'service consultant' - yes who was gay, and who was sitting next to another gay guy. Hmmm perhaps I was more insightful than originally intended with the term Jet-"frills".

Trainee-frills took FOREVER to check us in. Had to see manager-frills to fix up his mistakes.

We then played TRS hide-and-seek. There is a TRS before customs peoples!

Finally, we are at Gate 34 waiting for flight that is stopping over @ the Gold Coast.

Am fading fast ...

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Hacked Helmet

2009-01-23T02:00:00.001+11:00

In the midst of my last minute packing frenzy, I noticed the hacked-up state of my helmet.

It's almost as if someone visited Kew in NSW, bought themselves an axe from the "Big Axe" (see post below) and re-enacted the Mac slaying wild pig. scene in Predator ... on my helmet.

Talk about poor aim.

Need to get some winks. Need to get up in a few hours, at which point I will be Japan bound.

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Food for Champions

2009-01-21T22:47:00.004+11:00

Just got demoralised in basketball, so to celebrate we are scoffing down some nutritious McDonald's.

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Under 20kgs Challenge

2009-01-20T00:27:00.001+11:00

Jet-frills and its 20kgs weight imprimatur is creating packing angst.

Also testing out mail to blogger function.

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Tina Fey (30) Rocks It Again!

2009-01-14T14:06:00.004+11:00

Tina Fey and her gem of a show 30 Rock, repeated her Emmy winning ways at the 2009 Golden Globes.

Admittedly I haven't enjoyed Season 3 as much I have the previous 2 seasons. Nevertheless, some of the material that comes out of that half hour show is serious laugh-out-loud material. Some notable quotes so far:

Gavin Volure: And the arts. I’m glad Jack was able to bring you, Liz. I asked him about you after I saw your photo in the style section of the New York Times.
Liz: Funny story. I only wore that because the fire alarm went off when I was getting a hair cut.

***
Kenneth: I don’t believe in hypothetical situations, Mr. Donaghy. That’s like lying to your brain.

***
Liz (to Oprah): I saw the show about following fear and it inspired me to wear shorts to work. It didn’t go great.

***
Jack: This is GE!
Devon: It’s just G now, Jack. I sold the E. To Samsung. They’re Samesung now. I was supposed to be at a board meeting 5 hours ago. Which ways Connecticut?